She Insulted Her Friend By Saying She Wants Nothing To Do With Her Baby, Since She Doesn’t Like Kids
This 29-year-old woman has never enjoyed being around kids or wished to have children of her own. In fact, she doesn’t even like holding babies.
“It’s not a phase or trauma or anything like that. I’m just not wired that way,” she explained.
“I’ve always said I don’t want to be a mom or have anything to do with parenting.”
But now that her 30-year-old friend, Anna, recently had a baby, her dislike of children has taken a toll on their relationship. For some context, they’ve known each other since college and have always stayed in touch, and while they’re “close,” she doesn’t consider Anna her best friend.
Anyway, Anna always wanted to have kids, so following the baby’s birth, she was thrilled for her friend. She also bought a gift for Anna’s baby shower and dropped off food after the baby arrived home from the hospital.
Ever since her friend became a mom, though, it’s become clear that Anna expects her to “shift” her whole lifestyle to accommodate that.
It all started when Anna began making certain remarks, claiming she’d “change her mind” about kids one day and that she’d be the “cool auntie.” She was even told that once she held Anna’s baby, her heart would melt.
At first, she’d just laugh off the comments, but over time, they’ve gotten very annoying.
“Anna even started sending me parenting videos and baby milestone photos every other day. I don’t react, and she keeps pushing,” she added.
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Then, just last weekend, she was invited to a “moms and friends” gathering at Anna’s house, and she turned down the invitation. Since she doesn’t particularly like kids, she didn’t want to be surrounded by babies and diapers on her Saturday.
Anna didn’t take her rejection well and stated that she needed some “support.” She was also told that she should be there for Anna, given how things are hard for her now.
At that point, she decided to share her true feelings with Anna once and for all. She admitted that while she cares about her friend, she’s not interested in being involved with any “baby stuff.”
“I didn’t want to babysit. I’m still her friend, but nothing has changed on my end,” she noted.
If you couldn’t have guessed, Anna got super quiet and simply responded, “Wow, okay.” And following their conversation, they haven’t been speaking to each other.
She ultimately learned through a mutual friend that Anna was super upset, cried to people about the situation, and accused her of being “cold.”
To be clear, she genuinely never intended to be harsh toward Anna; she just wanted to be honest. And she made sure not to insult Anna’s baby or her friend’s parenting.
“I just don’t want to be involved. I didn’t sign up to be a second mom just because I don’t have kids of my own,” she reasoned.
“It feels like people think being child-free means I have all this free time and no emotional limits. I’m allowed to set boundaries, too.”
Not to mention, she has shown up for Anna in other ways. She checked on her friend during her pregnancy, sent gifts, and brought food. At the end of the day, she just wasn’t interested in playing a parental role in the baby’s life.
Nonetheless, she realizes that being a new mother can feel isolating, and now, she’s worried that she might’ve been too blunt.
Do you think she had the right to tell Anna the truth? Or should she have handled this differently?
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