His Dad Said He’s Difficult To Love Since He Isn’t The Biggest Fan Of His Wife
Sometimes the deepest cuts come from the people we never expected to hurt us. For him, it wasn’t just that his dad canceled plans; it was that the cancellation came with a gut punch: being told he was difficult to love because of his feelings toward his stepmom.
The comment felt like it erased years of effort, complicated history, and even the gradual progress he’d made with her over time.
Now, his dad wants to talk, but after such a brutal confession, he’s not sure there’s anything left to say. The question is whether walking away protects him from further hurt or just cements the distance for good.
A couple of weeks back, this 19-year-old guy was supposed to have spent the day hanging out with his dad. But at the last minute, his dad canceled their plans and confessed that he didn’t really want to see him.
His dad added that he’s difficult to love, since he dislikes his wife, and that’s making it nearly impossible for them to share a bond.
“This was totally out of nowhere. We’d had the plans for over two weeks, and I drove three hours just to be told that. I didn’t really have anything to say to any of that, so I walked out and went back home,” he explained.
“He has texted me a few times since then, asking why I left, saying he wants to talk. His wife and I texted a bit, and she told me she didn’t understand what happened.”
“I told her she might want to talk to him, and I filled her in on what happened. That took her by surprise, and she said she’d talk to him and get his head on straight. She later texted and apologized that he did it supposedly on her behalf, and she wanted me to know there are no hard feelings.”
Backstory here: his dad married his wife, Lil, nine years ago, and he really disliked this woman from the beginning. Additionally, he was hurt that his dad got a new wife just two years after his mom passed away.
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Lil informed him that she got that he was not interested in viewing her as a mom or a stepmom, but she was willing to be his friend if that would work for him.
He was completely opposed to having any kind of a relationship with Lil, but he warmed up to her a little in time.
So, he and Lil have some kind of a connection now, even though they’re not exactly best friends.
“We’re not the most natural fit around each other, but we’re both pretty open and honest, which meant we didn’t hurt each other’s feelings or anything, and we like each other,” he said.
“My dad never got involved, really. The only time he said anything was when Lil was pregnant with their first, and I was about to have a half-sibling.”
“Dad said he noticed I wasn’t very excited, and I was like, yeah, I’m not really. He told me he wanted it to be an exciting time for me as well, and I told him it just wasn’t. But I did later get involved a bit to make him happy, and that was basically it.”
Lil and his dad went on to have more kids, which never thrilled him, but he is fond of all of his half-siblings. He thought everything with his dad was going well, so that’s why he was shocked when his dad said he’s hard to love.
His dad has asked if they can talk about what occurred, but he doesn’t see the reason to have a chat when his dad made such a terrible confession.
What advice do you have for him?
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