She Wants Her Boyfriend To Unpack All Of Her Belongings After He Allowed Her To Move In, Then Changed His Mind
She didn’t need a grand gesture; she just needed him to mean what he said. He told her he was ready to share a home, to start building something real.
She gave up her lease, packed her life into boxes, and braced herself for a huge, vulnerable step. And then, he backed out. Like it hadn’t been her future on the line.
Now she’s standing in a place she never planned to be, physically and emotionally, wondering if asking him to carry the weight he dropped is actually petty—or the only thing keeping her from feeling like a complete fool.
Not so recently, this woman and her boyfriend had a chat about living with one another. She asked her boyfriend countless times throughout the last month if he meant it – that he wanted her to move in with him.
Each time she brought it up, he reassured her that he was serious about taking this next step in their relationship.
Since he expressed his desire to live with her, she never expected he would go back on his word or change his mind.
So, she packed up her whole apartment and got ready to move to her boyfriend’s place. She also informed her landlord that she would not be renewing her lease.
But at the last minute, her boyfriend froze!
“He backed out and basically said he didn’t think it was the right time anymore. No big fight, no warning, just… ‘never mind,'” she explained.
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“It was obviously emotionally upsetting, and also really frustrating logistically. I had already packed everything, planned around it, and felt blindsided.”
“I’ve since moved into a different place, but I’ve been feeling really drained and overwhelmed unpacking everything by myself.”
She and her boyfriend surprisingly haven’t broken up over this, and he said he was willing to help her get all of her belongings out of boxes.
She is considering just making her boyfriend unpack everything by himself. It’s not that she’s trying to be petty; she invested a lot of time into packing up her life, and it was unfair of him to change his mind at the last minute like that.
She feels like he’s the one who made a mess out of things, so he should be held accountable for that. Some of her friends think she’s being spiteful to expect her boyfriend to unpack her things.
“So…[am I the jerk] for wanting him to unpack my entire apartment since he’s the reason I had to pack it in the first place?” she wondered.
“He was the one who initiated the move-in, told me to live with him rent-free. He seemed hesitant at points, so I asked, ‘Are you SURE you’re ready? I need to know if not, so I can renew my lease.'”
“Each time, he insisted yes. I was giving him MANY outs, and it wasn’t my idea in the first place.”
What do you think?
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