She Wants To Exclude One Of Her Daughter’s Friends From Her Birthday Sleepover Because This Girl Is A Problem
No one wants to be the parent who excludes a child. But there’s a big difference between being unkind and being realistic about who you let into your home, and around your kid overnight.
This mom isn’t judging; she’s just paying attention. And when one kid in a friend group is constantly creating chaos, stirring up drama, and crossing boundaries that aren’t age-appropriate? That’s a problem.
In a week, this woman’s daughter will be celebrating her eighth birthday, and she wants to invite all of her friends to do some fun things with her, then have a sleepover that night.
While this is simple for her to accommodate, her daughter wants to invite four of her friends, and one of them is a nightmare, considering how she acts.
“She is one of those girls who is ALWAYS the center of drama. Spreading lies, talking about boys, pitting friends against one another. She is also 10 years old, while my daughter and the other 3 friends are the same age,” she explained.
“Just 2 Sundays ago, she made one of the girls in the group cry because ‘she’s off of her list since she talks to (my daughter) more and it’s not fair.'”
“She says things like ‘tell me who you have a crush on or else I’m going to (insert some form of punishment).’ One time, she took a kid’s money (during Sunday school) and blamed it on my daughter. It wasn’t until church service was over and this kid was crying about his missing coins that the truth came out.”
A year ago, they invited this girl over to their house for a play date, and she heard this girl question her daughter about whether she had a boyfriend.
Her daughter responded that she was too young, and this girl FaceTimed her boyfriend to prove he was real. Surprised, she walked into her daughter’s bedroom, so the girls hung the phone up fast.
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Later on, her husband heard this girl asking their daughter if her dad truly lived in their house. Apparently, this girl thought that because she was folding the kids’ clothes and didn’t see her husband’s clothes in the laundry pile, she thought he lived somewhere else.
Since then, they have not invited this girl back for a play date, but her daughter and the other three girls in their friend group all hang out at church.
“She is one of those kids who has just been exposed to way too much at her age, and I really can’t imagine having her for a whole day, PLUS a sleepover,” she added.
“She is being raised by her grandmother, who doesn’t seem to care/notice any of her behavior. We talk to our daughter about real-life things, but in an age-appropriate way. For example, my daughter understands that having a crush on someone at her age is normal, but she is not allowed to date or anything like that until she’s a teenager.”
“So I said all that to say, would I be wrong if I allow my daughter to not invite this child, KNOWING all of the girls will be talking about it when they all see each other at church again? Part of me feels so terrible for even considering leaving her out, but I just want my daughter to enjoy her day with no drama.”
I don’t think she’s wrong for leaving this girl off the guest list. Birthdays should be safe, happy, and drama-free. That one girl’s feelings are not more important than every other child’s comfort, including her daughter’s. Sometimes being the “mean mom” just means you’re the one paying attention.
What do you think?
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By Bre Avery Zacharski
Hi, I'm Bre, Chip Chick's CEO! I have a degree in Textile/Surface Design from The Fashion Institute of Technology, and... More about Bre Avery Zacharski
