She Went On A Date With A Guy Who Rejected Her For Talking Too Much

Dating apps make it easy to fall into the rhythm of constant connection: texts that stretch late into the night, inside jokes that feel like promises, and daydreams about how good it could be in person. You get to build a version of someone through words, and it feels safe, funny, and familiar.

But real life doesn't come with typing bubbles or backspace keys. When you get to meet someone face-to-face, sometimes, that chemistry that felt so effortless through a screen doesn't always translate across a table.

That's exactly what she unfortunately discovered after weeks of long talks with a guy she thought could be the one for her. Everything about their messages made her think they'd step into real life already halfway in love.

Several weeks ago, this 22-year-old girl began talking to a 23-year-old guy she met through a dating app, and they seemed to have an authentic bond in her eyes.

Well, she says she thought they might be a picture-perfect couple based on how their conversations were going, and they talked to one another practically every single day.

They would call and text, and she figured that when they got to meet in real life, the sparks and butterflies would be all over the place.

When the day of their first date arrived, she was having an amazing time with him. They went café-hopping, shared a lot of laughs, and took a walk together.

However, she realized that he was being pretty silent, so she questioned him about whether she was irritating him or if he didn't like their date.

He reassured her that he was just feeling a lot of pressure in law school, and that he was having a nice time with her, so she wasn't the cause of his quietness. He added that he's a bit more of an introvert on top of that, and he prefers listening to being the more talkative one.

Sunshine - stock.adobe.com - illustrative purposes only, not the actual person

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"So, I tried to make him feel comfortable. I asked him questions, tried to engage him in conversation, and made sure it didn’t feel like a one-sided talk.... I didn’t want to be the only one carrying the conversation, so I tried to get him to open up a little," she explained.

"After what I thought was a wonderful day, we both went home. I texted him later that night to thank him for such a nice time. But then his reply broke me....He said the date was perfect, but that we weren’t the perfect match."

"He told me he’s a quiet person, and I’m an extremely energetic person who loves to talk, and that 'he’s the wrong chair, and I shouldn’t sit on it.' That completely broke me, because I genuinely felt like there was a real connection."

She feels so sad, humiliated, and puzzled that he rejected her for chatting on their date. She was hoping to get to know him better, which is why she was yapping so much, and she was trying her best to engage him. She's left wondering if she should have dialed it down instead of being true to herself.

I think that perhaps he's trying to let her down gently, and being yourself isn't a flaw; it just means you haven’t met the right match yet.

The right guy will never make her feel like her energy is too much or that her personality leaves something to apologize for.

It's disappointing when someone you clicked with decides you're not the match they imagined, but that's part of dating and putting yourself out there, isn't it? So instead of replaying every word or wishing she'd been quieter, she should focus on continuing to meet new guys.

What advice do you have for her?

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