For TikToker Lindsey (@linzjacks) and her husband, it wasn’t their first time on the emotional rollercoaster of the adoption process. They recently had their third adoption fall through.
They were working with 18 and 19-year-old birth parents whom they had never met before. The birth mom had been counseled by the adoption agency back in December, and they created an adoption plan. The baby was due at the beginning of February.
The young couple already had a one-and-a half-year-old, and the father was getting ready to enlist in the Navy, so she would be raising their child mostly on her own.
They chose adoption because the mother didn’t feel like she had the resources or mental capacity to raise two kids at the time.
This all made sense to Lindsey and her husband, but when they got to the hospital for the birth of the baby, they started to notice some signs that things wouldn’t be going in their favor.
The birth father ended up staying at the hospital all weekend, even though he originally said that he wouldn’t be there.
When they asked the case worker the best way to navigate the situation, they were told that the baby would stay with them. When the birth mom wanted to see the baby, she could just ask the nurse to bring the baby back.
However, the birth parents started keeping the baby in their room for five to six hours at a time while Lindsey and her husband just sat and waited in the other room. Then, their family members began showing up and hung out in their room for hours.
“After being in the hospital for 36 hours, the birth mom kept asking about being discharged before the 48-hour waiting period where she was going to sign, which meant she would either need to sign a third-party release form for the agency to have custody of the baby or she leaves the hospital with the baby and then she would sign the next day,” explained Lindsey.
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When the case worker walked out of the birth mom’s room after interviewing her, Lindsey and her husband immediately knew the baby wouldn’t be coming home with them.
Before a birth mom can be discharged from the hospital, a social worker has to make sure she understands her rights and that the adoption plan is truly her decision.
The birth mom agreed to answer a bunch of questions in front of her family, not realizing that they would be so personal. The situation compromised her decisions and influenced her ability to answer the questions.
Afterward, the birth mom said that she just wanted to be discharged from the hospital. She took the baby home with her that night and said she would sign the relinquishment papers in the morning.
Meanwhile, Lindsey and her husband were also discharged. They went to their hotel and watched TV. The next day, they received the call that the birth mother had decided to keep the baby.
So, their adoption fell through because of a conversation they weren’t in the room for.
By Emily Chan
Emily Chan is a writer who covers lifestyle and news content. She graduated from Michigan State University with a degree in... More about Emily Chan
