It’s painful enough to be cheated on, but how would you feel if you found out that your spouse was still Googling their old affair partner every single week?
This 31-year-old woman has a 41-year-old husband, and they do not have kids together. The problem in their marriage is that her husband has lied and cheated on her. His other favorite activity is gaslighting her.
She thinks he’s a covert narcissist, especially since he loves feeding on the attention and mercy of women around him. A year ago, she sadly uncovered her husband’s affair.
“I caught him last year, he was saying I love you, shared our song to her, telling her exactly [the] same things he tells me, [and] made her buy the same dress he asked me to buy,” she explained.
“Whenever I confronted him about him cheating on me, based on my observation and knowing him, he gaslighted me a lot.
When I asked for a divorce, he didn’t want to and begged me for a chance.”
“I am a people pleaser and dumb, so I said yes, I genuinely thought it would work. I even tried to understand why he cheated. He was fighting his own demons, bla, bla, bla.”
Now, she and her husband share an account on Google, so she can easily see his browsing history on the internet, though she believes he failed to realize that.
For the last three months, she’s caught her husband looking up his old mistress online every single week. He does it on his lunch break and goes to Google to check out photos of her.
She’s not only aware of what her husband is doing; she has been taking screenshots of his behavior and saving the evidence in case she needs it.
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“We have a finance company in Asia together, [and] we are preparing to move there in some months. I don’t want to lose that company; it needs both of us to function, plus I really want to move there. We share a pet together; she is our child,” she continued.
“Despite all that, I care about him a lot. How do I ask for [a] divorce and stand my ground? I give in easily whenever he begs; we are both people with no family or anyone to rely on for support.”
“I can handle myself, but I am worried about him. I don’t want to be romantically involved with him anymore. All this cheating, I can’t. Some tips on how to talk [about] the divorce?”
Well, I don’t see her being able to get a divorce while still keeping the company she shares with her husband. I think she should talk to a lawyer to help her figure this out, as this is certainly a messy situation to extract herself from.
Only after she gets some tips from a lawyer should she go about requesting a divorce from her husband, but she should be prepared to have to give up her share of the company. I can’t see them working amicably together after their marriage ends, but I could be wrong!
What advice do you have for her?
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By Bre Avery Zacharski
Hi, I'm Bre, Chip Chick's CEO! I have a degree in Textile/Surface Design from The Fashion Institute of Technology, and... More about Bre Avery Zacharski
