A new coworker who somehow becomes the center of your spouse’s entire world in a matter of weeks is worth taking note of. So what would you do if you found yourself vying for attention with your spouse’s coworker?
This 28-year-old woman’s 25-year-old husband has been spending an astounding amount of time with his new male coworker, Mark, and she’s beginning to worry that he has feelings for this guy.
Now, her husband is interested in men as well as women, so her fear is well-founded. It was back in January that Mark started working for her husband’s company.
Instantly, her husband came home from work, gushing over how much he had in common with Mark, including their sense of humor and taste in video games.
Her husband has made it seem like he and Mark are pretty much the same person, except for Mark’s enjoyment of metal music.
A month later, her husband exclusively started listening to metal music. In March, her husband got an email from his job inviting him to an event, but he declined.
The following day, her husband told her that he’s now going to the event, even though he never attends these kinds of things, because Mark begged him to change his mind.
Several weeks ago, Mark actually complained about her husband’s time management to one of their managers, and her husband was deeply hurt that day.
When he came home from work, he said Mark wasn’t the amazing guy he’d thought he was, so he was no longer down to be his friend.
Sign up for Chip Chick’s newsletter and get stories like this delivered to your inbox.
Recently, she took note of her husband increasingly spending time on his phone, so she questioned him about it, and he said he was talking to Mark.
She brought up the incident that had changed his opinion of Mark, and her husband claimed he forgot about the whole thing, and they’re back on good terms.
“Now, for the last few weeks, my husband comes home from work, eats dinner, and immediately goes to his computer and games and voice calls with Mark for about 3/4 hours,” she explained.
“[On] the weekends, he is texting him during the day and gaming together at night. I should mention my husband talks about Mark all the time too, I know so much about this man when I’ve never asked.”
“Last night I asked my husband if we could maybe do something together because he’s spending loads of time with Mark lately, my husband became very defensive and upset. He told me I don’t ‘allow’ him to have friends, and I should just accept him wanting to spend time with him.”
It’s not that she doesn’t want her husband to have his own friends; it’s just that his relationship with Mark seems to be pretty passionate and extreme.
Her husband and Mark spend 8 hours at work every single day, then come home and spend a couple more hours together online. On the weekends, her husband and Mark also spend hours online with one another.
She is aware that she could be reading too much into things, but her husband is obsessed with Mark, and he’s acting like he did when she first began dating him.
“I don’t think he’s physically cheating on me, but maybe emotionally? I’m just wondering if I might be overthinking this all, or how I could have a conversation with my husband about this, and how it makes me feel, without causing him to become defensive again,” she concluded.
I want to say that her husband wouldn’t be defensive if nothing was going on between him and Mark, but also it’s insane that he’s spending hours a day outside of the office with this guy while ignoring her.
It’s not normal for anyone to devote that kind of time to a coworker or a friend. She should just outright ask her husband if he has feelings for Mark, but if she thinks that’s going to set him off, she can start by asking him to spend more time with her.
What advice do you have for her?
You can read the original post below.
By Bre Avery Zacharski
Hi, I'm Bre, Chip Chick's CEO! I have a degree in Textile/Surface Design from The Fashion Institute of Technology, and... More about Bre Avery Zacharski
