How would you feel if your spouses’s sibling asked you to put your dreams on hold because they needed a babysitter, of all things? Would you say yes, because family comes first no matter what, or tell them to take a hike?
This woman’s 40-year-old husband has forever had a combative relationship with his 43-year-old sister, and it dates back to when they were quite little.
Her husband’s sister constantly expects him to do anything to help her out, often because she either can’t deal with the situation at hand or is too flooded with panic to figure it out.
“These scenarios are typically overblown and completely outside the scope of what I believe to be a normal brother/sister relationship,” she explained.
“For example, she lives on the other side of the country, and her husband travels for work. She’ll regularly ask my husband to fly out (on his dime) to help with her children.”
“When he turns her down, she makes it seem like he’s the worst brother in the world, and totally guilt-trips him.”
Now, she and her husband have spent the last 17 months on a grueling path towards starting a family of their own. Six months into their journey, her husband’s sister announced that she was pregnant with baby number two.
She came in like a wrecking ball with the news, but she and her husband managed to slap smiles on their faces while managing to protect themselves.
Several months ago, her husband’s sister gave birth to her baby. While all of this has been happening, her husband’s mom has been very sick and receiving treatments for her illness.
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Her husband’s mom still needs to undergo various treatments, and at the same time, she and her husband have been given the go-ahead to begin IVF. Due to that, she and her husband have to stay close to home.
This brings us to the problem: her husband’s sister’s husband has to go on a work trip, and when he booked it, they all figured that her husband’s mom would feel better and could fly to her husband’s sister to help out with her two kids.
“Now she’s unable to travel, and SIL is calling my sick MIL to have her try to cajole my husband into flying out to help. We, as I said, are unable to travel, but she doesn’t believe this is a good enough reason,” she continued.
“The thing that made me come here was that she asked us to put off IVF for a month so he could fly out and help her for two weeks. My MIL repeated that ask, which was upsetting for us. SIL doesn’t seem to want to hire a babysitter and says my husband is her only option.”
“So my question: [am I the jerk] here? Is it wrong for us not to put our lives on hold to fly out and help her with her kids, which is not only NOT allowed by our doctor, but also triggering?”
Lol, what? Her husband should be telling his sister to hire a local babysitter instead of inconveniencing them! This is an outrageous level of entitlement.
If I were her, I would be pushing my husband to cut contact with his sister, as she clearly thinks the world revolves around her.
What advice do you have for her?
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By Bre Avery Zacharski
Hi, I'm Bre, Chip Chick's CEO! I have a degree in Textile/Surface Design from The Fashion Institute of Technology, and... More about Bre Avery Zacharski
