One time, TikToker @shanrileyyy went out with a guy who was mad that she didn’t sleep with him on the first date. Later on, he told her that if they hadn’t slept together after three dates, he would stop talking to her and probably end things by ghosting her.
This was also the same man who strongly stated that he wanted a wife and kids. Another thing he said that stopped her in her tracks was that he didn’t want his wife to work.
“I think a lot of men say that because they think that’s what women want to hear,” she said. “And maybe it is what some women want to hear, but for me, I’m going to ask some questions when you say something like that.”
When she proposed a scenario where his future wife would want to work, he immediately responded that he would not allow his wife to report to another man.
He was willing to pay for whatever business his wife started, whether it was a pilates studio or a coffee shop, but it was unacceptable for her to have another man as her boss.
Also, when she tried to explain to him what a luteal phase was, he cut her short and assumed that what she was talking about wasn’t real because he had never heard of it before.
In this dating pool, it’s clear why @shanrileyyy continues to stay single.
In the comments section, many women shared their own experiences with relationships and pointed out that dependence on a man can become isolating or harmful.
“I bought into the ‘you don’t have to work.’ So, I didn’t, and now, 20 years as a stay-at-home mom, and it was the biggest error I have made in my life. Love my kids, love the times I’ve had with them, but I should have at least stayed part-time in the workforce. Always keep your foot in the door,” commented one user.
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“I became a SAMH because it worked for us, but I studied, got accredited in multiple fields, and volunteered a lot, especially places that I could take my kids to. So, having returned to full-time work, I was able to progress quickly to a leadership role. The takeaway from this: the choice was mine, not his, and it worked for us,” wrote another.
“I’m 59. I haven’t been on a date since I was 27. I’m happy my house is clean, and my two dogs love me, and I’ve never come home to my dogs saying hey, you know what, I found another owner I like better than you,” added a third.
Overall, conversations in dating can quickly reveal incompatibilities. Some people wave red flags subtly, while others practically unfurl them like giant banners.
By Emily Chan
Emily Chan is a writer who covers lifestyle and news content. She graduated from Michigan State University with a degree in... More about Emily Chan
