A man says that his new fiancée has always been thrifty and independent, and those are two qualities about her are kind of causing some major problems right now.
Throughout basically their entire relationship, she has insisted on splitting everything evenly, especially since they make the same money in their careers.
This worked fine, but he did make a new career move and is now out-earning her by a lot. Despite this new development, she refuses to let him pay more than half of all the bills that they have together.
She strongly feels that “men who float their female partners financially always end up resenting them.”
He knows that that can happen in a relationship, because he has seen it firsthand. He believes that a lot of how his fiancée feels about splitting things equally comes back to the horrible divorce her parents went through.
Her dad tried to keep everything from her mom since she was a stay-at-home-mom, and his fiancée does make him feel like he could be capable of doing the same thing to her, which makes him feel bad.
“Also relevant is that she assures me she will be happy to start splitting bills proportionally to our respective incomes once she becomes the breadwinner (inevitable due to our respective industries), which really digs the knife in,” he explained.
Fast forward to the conversations they had about getting engaged; she said to him that she was planning on paying for his ring and hers too because it wasn’t equal.
He would not let her pay for her own engagement ring, and her sister helped him to pick out a ring he knew she would adore.