She’s Not Engaged But She’s Already Planning Her Wedding And When Her Boyfriend Found Out He Got Upset

This woman in her late twenties has been dating her partner for five years. They have already lived together for three years and are even looking to purchase a bigger house together. But, once any discussion of marriage surfaces, her partner clams up.
He has been married before– once to his high school sweetheart, which lasted for six years. They did suffer a traumatic breakup, but that was years ago.
Now, he and the woman openly talk about almost everything future-related.
“We talk about kids, houses, possible schools for kids, holidays, retirement plans, where else in the world we would live, and more,” the woman said.
“He is a happy and active participant in these discussions– including super long-term discussions.”
But, one topic of discussion is strictly “off-limits”– marriage.
“I don’t bring it up because I know his experience with his ex was bad. And, he is happy not to bring it up either,” the woman explained.
That was until recently, though. While the pair were talking, the topic of marriage briefly came up in conversation.
While it did not gain much momentum, one thing the woman’s boyfriend did say was that he “wasn’t opposed to remarrying” and considered it a logical next step in their relationship.

shchus – stock.adobe.com
The woman was pleased to know the possibility was on his radar and decided not to push further. Still, she got to thinking– if they are saving up for a larger home, maybe they should explore a budget for a wedding.
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“I was curious about pricing, venues, catering, decor, and more. I wanted to start researching so I could get an idea of how much this kind of event would cost,” the woman explained.
So, after scouring the web for different options, the woman began filling out a spreadsheet. She put approximate costs down for vendors and weighed the price variations of different venues.
The woman did not see anything wrong with what she was doing until she saw her boyfriend’s reaction.
“He came up to me while I was doing this and asked what I was doing. I didn’t think I had anything to hide, so I said I was just looking into what a wedding would cost,” the woman recalled.
“He immediately looked super uncomfortable and left.”
Her boyfriend ended up leaving unexpectedly to visit a friend and will not discuss the interaction ever since.
“Am I being insensitive looking into it this early? I know he had a bad breakup which ended his first marriage, his ex cheated, but should that be a consideration as to whether I should even look?” the woman wondered.
She also received two very different opinions after asking her family for advice. The woman’s brother called her “absolutely nuts” for researching anything wedding-related before she is engaged.
On the other hand, the woman’s mother believes it is reasonable to inquire about pricing for budgets-sake without making any hard purchases.
Regardless, now this woman is left in an awkward situation with her boyfriend. What would you have done in her shoes?
Do you think she totally jumped the gun or that her research was innocent? What advice would you give to the couple to move past this?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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