A Week Ago, One Of Her Best Friends Passed Away After Having A Baby, And Now She’s Scared To Get Pregnant Like She Was Planning

A woman admits that she has pretty much been scared of having a baby her entire life. She is married, and her husband is very aware of her position on childbirth, as he’s been in her life since they were in grade school.
The act of giving birth gives her “the creeps” yet she has figured all along that she could will herself into being strong and going through with a pregnancy despite her worst fears.
She was banking on the whole “mind over matter” thing being her ticket to handling pregnancy when the time came.
She has dreamed of being a mom forever, and her desire to have children greatly outweighs all of her fears.
Sadly, a week ago she experienced a terrible tragedy; one of her best friends passed away after having a baby, and this has dashed her plans of starting a family with her husband.
“…Last week a good friend of mine from high school died in childbirth,” she explained. “Her mother made the post and…honestly I don’t know what to say.”
“It sounded horrific. I’ve tied looking at pictures of babies. I love babies. But I feel nothing. In fact—more negative feelings than positive.”
Her best friend was healthy as could be, but she ended up having some complications before the doctors could save her life.
Now, she and her husband decided to start trying for a baby of their own in April, but she hasn’t yet told her husband that she doesn’t think she can do this after losing her best friend.

kuznetsov_konsta – stock.adobe.com
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“This is so big,” she said. “But I had always been traveling this fine line of fear and this finally knocked me over.”
“I don’t know how to tell him. I don’t think I will want to do this ever. I know I was afraid before but it has never felt like this.”
She has a blood clotting disorder that runs in her family which is also adding to her concerns about losing her life just like her friend did.
She had a full-blown panic attack several hours ago as she tried to figure out how to share her fears and feelings with her husband.
She still would love to have a child, but she knows she’s never going to be able to give birth to her child.
How can she best tell her husband about her change of heart?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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