Back In High School, Her Boyfriend Gave Up 2 Children For Adoption But He Kept This A Secret From Her

alfa27 - stock.adobe.com - illustrative purpose only, not the actual person
alfa27 - stock.adobe.com - illustrative purpose only, not the actual person

A 29-year-old woman thought she knew everything there was to know about her boyfriend, but she recently learned he kept an enormous secret from her throughout the duration of their 2-year relationship.

She and her boyfriend have both agreed to remain childfree. She doesn’t want kids of her own, as she had to raise her 8 younger siblings all alone, and quite frankly, that was enough parenting for her.

She’s looking forward to now being able to live her life on her own terms and do whatever she wants.

“My boyfriend is child-free because he said he never wanted kids and never saw himself as a dad,” she explained.

“He was the one to even initiate the topic saying it was important that he not enter a relationship with someone that wanted kids which I loved since before him EVERY single guy I’ve ever been with wanted children so I just felt like I would have to compromise and have kids in order to experience that love.”

A month ago, she found out that her boyfriend is hardly childfree. She began noticing that her boyfriend was doing his best to prevent her from seeing what he was doing on his phone, and he was no longer answering calls in front of her.

Then, she saw one evening on his laptop that he was talking to a guy named Ben and some girl in a group chat.

As she flipped through the messages between her boyfriend, Ben, and this girl, she was shocked to see that the people her boyfriend had been speaking to were referring to him as their dad.

She kept digging and found out that Ben was 12 and had reached out to her boyfriend first, claiming to be his son.

alfa27 – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purpose only, not the actual person

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Ben had a twin sister too, which is the girl her boyfriend was also talking to. Apparently, Ben and his sister just lost their mom, and while they were attending her funeral, they discovered that her boyfriend was their dad.

“I kept reading but I was so confused and sick,” she said. “We’re only 29. How can he have 12-year-old children he ever told me about?!”

“That he gave up for adoption at birth and never mentioned. He didn’t even start acting weird when his ex passed whom he never mentioned when we discussed our dating history, only when they emailed him.”

Her boyfriend arrived back at their place as she was searching through his laptop, so she had to quickly pretend she had never been snooping in the first place.

It’s been about a week since then, and she hasn’t brought it up to her boyfriend yet that she knows about his kids.

She has gone back through her boyfriend’s messages to stay updated on how he has been interacting with his children, and his kids clearly want him to be part of their lives.

She also saw that her boyfriend said he loves his kids and is willing to be in their lives as well and planning to meet up with them this year.

She is left wondering if her boyfriend was ever going to tell her about this big secret, and she really wants to tell him that she knows.

“I want to confront him about it but I’m scared of the outcome,” she continued. “I love him but I can’t believe he lied to me about not having kids and is now trying to be in their lives and not let me know.”

“I feel evil for going through his personal things which is how I found out and I know it’s technically the “noble” thing but I don’t know what to do.”

She feels that she’s going to need to give her boyfriend an ultimatum when she does address his secret with him; he can pick her, or he can pick the kids.

What’s the best way for her to break the news to her boyfriend that she knows about his secret?

You can read the original post on Reddit here.

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