She Went On A Date With A Guy, And As Soon As He Revealed He Was Just Looking For A Hookup, She Got Up And Left
Though women are often told that they have to not make a fuss and say yes to everything in order to make everyone happy, when you finally realize that you don’t owe anyone respect unless they earn it, you are going to be so powerful in social situations–including dates.
This is what TikToker Evie, @evmariexo, explained when she realized that she had all of the power to just say no, get up, and walk out on a date that she wasn’t satisfied with.
No more people pleasing, now it’s about doing what’s right for you– something that she described as an “incredible” feeling.
“So I matched with this dude on Hinge, he was 33 years old, and we had talked for like a week or two on the app, and then texting before we met up in person,” she explained. “On his app, he said that he was looking for something long term, but was like open to something short.”
This detail is the caveat in many people’s dating experiences that can throw the possibility of a relationship with that person right out the window.
“Everything that we had talked about really indicated that he was looking for something more serious,” Evie said. “We meet at this restaurant, and it’s like fifteen to twenty minutes into the date like we had just ordered drinks.”
So far, nothing was showing up as a major red flag for her. Things were going pretty well, and maybe there was actually a chance that this would go somewhere. But it wouldn’t stay that way for long.
“Then kind of, like, out of nowhere, he very casually mentions that he’s not really looking for anything serious,” she said.
“This was very much the first time that I was hearing this from him, and I don’t know what got into me, I just had this moment where I was like, I am not interested in a casual hookup culture thing.”
mtrlin – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
She ended up realizing that her time was significantly more valuable than this and that she had a lot of other better things that she could be doing besides wasting time on someone who wasn’t going to put the same amount of effort in as she was.
“I took a deep breath, I told him I totally understood what he was looking for, I calmly got up, I said that I just didn’t think this was a good use of my time and that I wished him the absolute best,” she said. “I took ten dollars out of my wallet, I put it on the table, and I said, ‘This should cover my drink and any tip that you plan to leave.'”
While she broke it off respectfully with him and left him her portion of the bill, it was still a nerve-wracking experience for someone who has never done that before in their life.
Her heart was pounding as she walked away, but it felt good in the end. Her strategy worked so well on him that he actually texted her to apologize afterward.
“He literally was speechless,” she said. “He was like, ‘I just want to apologize, I’m sorry if I said something that offended you.'”
She explained that he was trying to be suave by saying that he didn’t want anything long-term because he was afraid of looking too “clingy,” which she thought was a bizarre response to have at thirty-three years old.
“It is perfectly normal that both of us would be looking for something more long-term,” she said. “I don’t know where this whole toxic thing is coming from.”
https://www.tiktok.com/@evmariexo/video/7200484232370638126
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