She’s Taking A Break From Dating, But Love Is Everywhere, And She Really Does Want To Find The Perfect Guy
This 21-year-old woman is wrapping up her junior year of college. And throughout the past two semesters, she has put a ton of pressure on herself to find a guy that she really clicked with.
Now, she has never had a relationship before. But honestly, she genuinely wanted to find that spark and forge a connection with someone.
Unfortunately, though, her plan did not really work out, and she never wound up meeting anyone who fit the bill.
And since summer is right around the corner, she is now just considering taking a break from dating. After all, the majority of the college students from her area will head home– leaving her with few dating prospects until the fall.
“The only thing that makes it difficult is that I still want to have a romantic relationship,” she revealed.
Let’s face it: love seems to be everywhere. Whenever she goes online and sees videos of couples, reads books that have romantic plot lines, or stumbles upon couples her age whenever she goes out, her heart aches for a partner.
“It always just reinforces that want and makes me upset and anxious because I still haven’t found anyone,” she said.
At the same time, it makes her feel like she “needs” to be doing more in order to meet someone and enter a relationship.
To be clear: she claimed that she is actually okay with being single if the only other option is being in a relationship with someone she truly doesn’t like. After all, she has no intention of settling.
ClaudiK – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
“But I can’t help but have that urge to want a relationship and imagine the things I would do with a partner,” she vented.
That’s why she recently turned to people online asking for any advice on how to change her mindset surrounding dating in order to take a break and just focus on herself. Some people encouraged her to use “healthy distractions” over the summer in order to find her own sense of happiness.
“If you have time to think or feel bad, then you have time to do something else that occupies your mind,” began Character_Bill_9535.
“Read. If you pray, pray. If you meditate, meditate. Have fun: play video games, watch movies, whatever. Do a hobby. Find a cause you’re passionate about. Try and change the world. Help homeless people. Volunteer. Devote yourself to your career or studies. Watch educational videos. Reach out to a friend. Reach out to family,” they continued.
“There’s so much to be doing. If you really, really don’t want to date, then pick any of those things and do them.”
Other people got the sense that she did really want a relationship, though. So, they urged her to stop looking so hard and placing so much pressure on herself.
“It seems like when you are trying to find a relationship, that’s when you have the most difficulty. When you stop trying so hard, it seems like that’s when you find someone,” explained Fun_Ambassador_8514.
“Don’t put so much pressure on yourself… Don’t settle or just get into a relationship just because it’s the socially acceptable thing to do. Those usually end badly. No relationship is better than being with the wrong person.”
Have you ever been in this young woman’s shoes? Do you agree that it’s harder to find a relationship with you’re trying too hard, or is that just a cliche? How do you suggest she change her mindset this summer?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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