Her Boyfriend Wants Her To Help Pay For His Home Renovations, But She Told Him She’s Not Giving Him Any Money For This Until He Puts Her On The Deed

F8  Suport Ukraine - stock.adobe.com - illustrative purposes only, not the actual people
F8 \ Suport Ukraine - stock.adobe.com - illustrative purposes only, not the actual people

This woman and her boyfriend, who are both in their 30s, have been together for nearly two years. They plan to get married and start a family within the next year or so and are both financially stable.

However, her boyfriend is asking her to invest in renovations for their home, but she’s not sure that she feels comfortable doing so.

Within the past year, she agreed to move in with her boyfriend into a house that he had already owned for a number of years.

Before doing so, they set some ground rules in terms of paying for things such as groceries, gas, and the mortgage on the house.

She agreed to pay 40% of the monthly mortgage and utilities payment, everyday necessities like soap and toilet paper, and the couple decided to take turns purchasing groceries.

“I estimate these extra monthly costs to be around $400-500 and never complain,” she explained.

Ever since they first started dating, her boyfriend has brought up plans to renovate his house. The cost would get up to about $10K in renovations for the bathrooms alone.

While she’s fond of the idea and would love to have some of the new upgrades he has talked about, there is nothing wrong with the bathrooms, and therefore these renovations are not really necessary.

Still, he is insistent on getting these changes done before they start a family, and he wants her to contribute to them financially.

F8 \ Suport Ukraine – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual people

“I’ve always been upfront about my hesitation to contribute large amounts to a home I don’t own because we aren’t married yet, and I’m not on the deed,” she said.

“I also don’t want to be like his ex, who contributed to similar expenses, and obviously, that didn’t work out.”

After she shared these concerns with her boyfriend, he essentially belittled her concerns. He told her that her insecurity about his ex is silly because nothing is guaranteed in life anyhow, hinting that even if they get married, they could still get divorced.

She feels like, after this conversation, her boyfriend is resenting her for not contributing more and even mentioned that her monthly mortgage payments are not helpful enough.

“I’ve told him I have no issues with contributing more once I’m on the deed,” she concluded.

Do you think that she is right in holding out until her name is on the deed, or do you think that she should already be contributing her own money towards these renovations?

You can read the original post on Reddit here.

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