He Wants To Tell His Mom That His Terminally Ill Dad Can’t Live With Him And Has To Go Back To Living With Her
Two years ago, this man’s dad was sadly diagnosed with brain cancer, and it is terminal. The progression of his dad’s cancer happened quite slowly.
He has been able to spend more time with his dad than he anticipated, but the end is quickly approaching.
At first, he and his mom discussed sending his dad to a care home or allowing him to continue living in one of their homes.
Back then, his mom wanted his dad to live in a care home since he would have round-the-clock care.
“But now that he’s on a feeding tube and fully dependent, they won’t accept him any longer (we’ve learned A LOT about how messed up long-term care is through this experience),” he explained.
“My mother now wants him to stay in our house rather than hers, while she comes over to care for him. Here’s where things get complicated.”
“My wife is now pregnant with our first child, which obviously adds a lot of stress as is. But also, when we first talked about him being home, he was still relatively healthy; he could eat on his own, still talked, and could move around a bit.”
He’s very concerned that his mom is angling to get him and his wife to provide 24-hour care to his dad, and he suspects this is due to a few comments his mom has made recently.
She has said things to him, like he can take multiple breaks every day to help her care for her dad. She has also said that she will feel relieved to have his dad living with capable adults.
Omar – stock.adobe.com- illustrative purposes only
He and his wife do have the luxury of working from home, but they are working the entire time, not taking breaks and hanging out.
But, the bottom line for him is that he has no interest in allowing his dad to live in his home, as he will feel terrible if he passes away there.
He and his wife only recently moved into their house, and they dream of raising a family there. If his dad were to die in his house, he would not be comfortable living there any longer and would have to sell it. He knows that he and his wife won’t be able to afford a comparable home in their zip code, as they got theirs for a steal.
“I don’t want my wife to give birth and have to be packing up and uprooting our family just as it begins,” he said.
“My mother lives just 5 minutes away, he could easily be set up back at their home, and we’re close enough to help at a moment’s notice. But in her mind, she’s scared if there’s an emergency, she can’t handle it by herself.”
“I can’t help but feel like she wants to push him into our house just because it’s easier for her. I’m debating whether I give her a firm refusal, but can’t help but feel like that will make me [a jerk]. Of course, I love both my parents, but this could potentially be devastating and ruinous to my newly settled family.”
Do you think it would be mean for him to tell his mom that his dad cannot live with him?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
If true crime defines your free time, this is for you: join Chip Chick’s True Crime Tribe
I’m Sure You’ve Heard About The Royal Ballet, But Do You Know The Story of The Woman Who Founded It?
Seamlessly Transition Your Home Decor From Summer To Fall With These Simple Tips
Here’s How You Can Easily Make Tacos Using A Bundt Pan
Sign up for Chip Chick’s newsletter and get stories like this delivered to your inbox.
More About:Relationships