He And His Girlfriend Wanted A Week To Themselves With Their Newborn Before Having Anyone Over To Meet Their Baby, But His Mom Freaked Out On Him And Felt Entitled To Visit
This man and his girlfriend are going to have a baby soon.
After discussing the idea, they settled on asking both of their families to wait a week after the birth before visiting them because they wanted to enjoy the first week of parenthood and rest. They planned to announce when they were ready to allow family and friends to come over.
While he wouldn’t have minded people coming over the following day after arriving home, since he’d seen all the mothers in his family do this, he understood how his girlfriend felt and stood the decision she wanted the two of them to make together.
His girlfriend’s mother is planning to be at the hospital for the delivery, and she told them that she could take care of their baby for them during their first night home so that they could sleep. They haven’t agreed to this yet and said that they’ll wait and see how they feel about the idea once their baby is born.
Later, he got together with his parents and informed them that he and his girlfriend wanted a week to themselves with their baby after the birth.
Unfortunately, his mother was not pleased to hear this.
She was stunned that they weren’t going to let her come over to see their newborn right after they returned home from the hospital.
He explained to his mother that their plan wasn’t set in stone because they didn’t know how the delivery would go. Since he wasn’t sure how exhausted his girlfriend would be after giving birth, he was predicting that neither of them would be up for visitors during their first week home with the baby.
At first, his mother was depressed by this news. But she quickly became enraged, questioning his masculinity and telling him that he was just doing what his girlfriend wanted.
BGStock72 – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
His mother demanded that he tell his girlfriend that his parents are allowed to visit on their first day home after being discharged from the hospital.
After that, she locked herself in the bathroom sobbing.
When she finally emerged from the bathroom, she told him to leave.
“My dad was disappointed but was much calmer and said we should consider changing our minds for the sake of my mom, as she has done a lot for us. I left. The next morning, my sister calls and essentially tells me off for upsetting Mom and asking why my girlfriend’s mom can see the baby but ours can’t,” he said.
Once he got off the phone with his sister, he called his mother, and to try to make her feel better, he told her that it was for certain that they wouldn’t allow visitors for an entire week, emphasizing that she and his father would be some of the first people he and his girlfriend wanted to invite over to meet their baby.
In order to try to smooth things over, he assured his mother that she and his father could come over to the house sooner than a week after he and his girlfriend arrived home with their newborn.
He continued, explaining that they’d come up with this idea because they wanted to avoid people showing up to their house unannounced.
“We wanted control over who was coming. My mom said that us wanting control was ridiculous and went on to say, ‘I’ve got four grandkids who I’m perfectly happy with if this is how you’re going to be!’ She was very annoyed and said that she’s been there for all my firsts and that she can’t believe we would do this to her and my father,” he explained.
Before ending the call, his mother told him that she was still mad.
His girlfriend then stepped in and gave his father a call so that she could walk him through why they’d come to this decision.
She let his father know that they were unsure of how smoothly her delivery would go and how she’d be feeling physically, and she said that all his son was doing was being supportive of her choice and agreeing to wait a week before they allowed visitors.
When he and his girlfriend came up with this request for time and space, they never intended to hurt anyone’s feelings. All they wanted was the chance to bond with their newborn on their own for a few days, hold and cuddle their baby, and allow for time for his girlfriend to physically heal.
Later on, his father called him and told him that he would try to make his mother see reason, acknowledging that she was out of line for her behavior.
His father continued, explaining that whenever his mother is upset, or someone offends her, she channels her feelings outward, tearing down those who hurt her in an attempt to make herself feel better.
This was why she spoke so unkindly to him–because she wanted him to feel upset in turn.
Toward the end of the conversation, his father assured him that he would do his best to get his mother to settle down, adding that, hopefully, soon, he could come over to their house to have a talk with her and come to an understanding.
“Yesterday, he called back, saying to give it a day or two as she is still angry. And she has said that when I do go to their house, she wants some questions answered. One of these being, ‘Why were we at the back of the queue, and why now are we allowed to see the baby the next day?'” he shared.
Despite his mother feeling like she and his father had supposedly been last in line to meet his and his girlfriend’s baby, this was never the case. All they asked for was a few days to bond with their child before family and friends came over.
In his mother’s view, it’s not fair that his girlfriend’s mother is allowed to be at the hospital for the delivery, and she’s aware that his girlfriend’s mother wanted to come over to take care of the baby on their first day back home.
His mother feels like this means that his girlfriend’s mother is the first family member being prioritized.
As for his girlfriend’s father, he didn’t have any problem with their request for time and space.
In response to his girlfriend’s text message about the matter, her father told her that it was perfectly fine and that it was good they were making the right choice for themselves.
Throughout the ongoing drama with his mother, he and his girlfriend have been on the same page about everything, and he has been completely supportive of what his girlfriend wants for their first few days of parenthood.
All of the choices they make are made together.
What advice would you give him?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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