His Ex-Wife Asked For A Divorce While She Was Battling Stage 3 Leukemia, But Now He Feels Guilty That He Wasn’t By Her Side At The End
Two years ago, when this man and his wife were 32 years old, his wife was tragically diagnosed with stage 3 leukemia.
Her doctors couldn’t predict how the disease would play out, and the eventual outcome was pretty unpredictable.
Luckily, their jobs paid enough of an income, along with their insurance, for them to pay for her treatment.
One month into his wife receiving treatment, she shocked him with the news that she wanted to divorce.
“Her explanation was that she was happy, but because we got married so young (we were both 22), she feels like she missed out on a lot in life and wanted to experience it with what little time she may have left,” he said.
Understandably, he was stunned to hear this, and he suggested that they try going to couples counseling, but she rejected the idea, assuring him that there was nothing wrong with their marriage, which he agreed with.
He did his best to give his wife space, and they were separated for a year before they were officially divorced because he was holding off on going through with the proceedings.
The final month before their divorce was final, they had almost no communication with one another.
One day, he called his soon-to-be ex-wife and let her know that he would be bringing over the paperwork that he just finished signing.
Stanislav – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
He was at her house and gave her the paperwork, and he told her that if she changed her mind, he would get back together with her without a second thought, adding that if it was her wish for him to stay by her side through the rest of her journey through this disease, he would be willing to support her.
Then, he clarified to her that if she rejected the idea of getting back together, he wouldn’t come back to her after leaving.
In the end, she wanted to continue with finalizing their divorce, so he left her house, and a while later, their divorce was official.
Over the next several months, he focused on moving forward and coping with the end of his marriage.
He didn’t date anyone, and as far as he knew, she didn’t either, but he wouldn’t have minded if she did choose to date someone.
Roughly 10 months after their divorce was finalized, one of his ex-wife’s friends contacted him.
“She told me that my ex never responded to treatment and was in the hospital just waiting for the end. She cried a lot and was scared about dying. She never asked to see me or mentioned me, at least when this friend was around, but she was overheard saying at one point that she made a mistake, and she may have been referring to our divorce,” he explained.
His ex-wife’s friend told him that she should try to visit her in the hospital to give her some support during such a difficult time, but he rejected this idea.
After his wife was diagnosed with leukemia, he attempted to accept the fact that she could pass away from the disease, that she initiated the divorce, that she didn’t want to be around him anymore, and that they would no longer have contact with each other.
Even though he acknowledged that his ex-wife was going through a lot, it was tough for him as well.
“It was painful for the only person I loved to push me away and tell me there is nothing I can do for her. I know seeing her would just bring all the pain back, lively for us both, and she made the choice to let me go,” she shared.
Sadly, his ex-wife passed away a month after the conversation he had with her friend. He clarified that his choice not to see his ex-wife in the hospital wasn’t made out of vengeance or to punish her.
However, he was aware of the selfishness behind his decision because he didn’t want to allow his ex-wife to crush him all over again, regardless of whether or not she wanted him to visit her.
He didn’t attend his ex-wife’s funeral because he didn’t want the focus to be taken away from her, so he knew that this choice was selfless on his part.
Also, he didn’t want the topic of the divorce brought up at the funeral service. Since his ex-wife’s passing, he has visited her grave to tell her goodbye in private, and her parents contacted him and told him that they had no hard feelings about him.
After that, he hasn’t talked with her family or any of her friends.
What advice would you give him?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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