She Admits She Has Daddy Issues, And She’s Wondering If It’s A Red Flag, Since All The Guys She’s Dated Run When They Find Out
This young woman sadly grew up in a terrible home, and her dad was a nightmare. She currently has basically no relationship with him, but she is very close to her siblings and mom.
She knows that when it comes to dating, people in general believe that it’s a green flag to have a close bond with your mom and dad, but she had no control over her dad’s behavior.
She simply can’t help how she was treated as a kid and that it resulted in her lack of a relationship with him as an adult.
She keeps finding that when she is ready to discuss the touchy topic of her dad not being a part of her life, guys think this is an enormous issue.
“And it seems that whenever I’m ready to broach the subject with someone I’m dating, he just walks out,” she explained. “Daddy issues are just SUCH a huge problem, I guess.”
She has learned over the years not to overshare too quickly into dating a guy, as they run for the hills, but she takes her time and decides when she should inform them.
Of course she has emotional damage and baggage from her childhood, but she says every single person has some sort of baggage they carry around.
She doesn’t understand why guys are viewing her daddy issues as a major red flag, as she never expects any of them to play caretaker or therapist to her.
She just believes it’s important that guys know this about her, and can support her through her problems when they arise. She also has identified what triggers her, and she can work through them all well.
velimir – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual people
“I usually don’t talk about it until a few months into knowing the guy,” she said. “And I’m not going to do a whole spiel here but the bottom line is I’ll say that growing up, I was hit, yelled at, belittled, etc.”
“I don’t describe it graphically and essentially just say I was abused. Then segue into saying now I struggle with depression because of it – but in terms of getting better, I plan on therapy when I’m able to get it (it’s a whole to-do with my current living situation), I have a proper support system, and I’ve reflected enough on my view of men that I don’t really have any negative associations. I like men.”
So although she has the right approach, it somehow always turns into the wrong result. She’s wondering if she just has had a string of bad luck with guys that can’t be bothered, or if daddy issues are a major turn-off across the board for guys.
What advice do you have for her?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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