He’s Gone On Three Dates With A Girl He Really Likes, But It Bothers Him That She Always Expects Him To Pay
Several weeks ago, this 27-year-old guy met a girl the same age as him on a dating app. Ever since they have gone on three dates so far, and they’re really getting along excellently.
It’s easy for them to find things to talk about, and they have a lot of similarities. But there is one thing about this girl that is really bothering him: she always expects him to pay on their dates.
Now, on their first date, they casually grabbed coffee and went for a walk, and he spent $30 on that outing.
He didn’t pay the money he spent any mind, as he knows it’s polite for the person who asks someone on a date to pay for it, and he was the one who asked her out.
“The second was a bit more upscale, dinner at a nice place, with the bill coming to about $70,” he explained.
“When the bill arrived, there was a noticeable pause, and it seemed like she was waiting for me to take the lead, so I ended up covering it again.”
“Our third date was similar, this time the bill was closer to $90, and again, the expectation seemed to be that I would handle it.”
When their third date was over, he made the bold choice to bring up a touchy subject, and he launched right into dating finances.
He likes treating a girl, but he believes it’s important to be equal and share the costs of your dates.
rohappy – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
He did bring this up to the girl he’s dating, and she responded that she thinks guys should always pay, as it shows their interest.
But he feels that if you’re forming a partnership, you should take turns paying on dates. He doesn’t like traditional gender roles where men should only be viewed as providers and women as dependant upon them.
“I’m at a crossroads,” he said. “On one hand, I really like this woman and our time together. On the other, I’m hesitant about entering into a dynamic that doesn’t align with my values, especially when it comes to equality and finances. I earn a decent living, as does she, so it’s not about the money—it’s about the principle.”
“Am I making too much of this? Should I just accept this difference in perspective and move forward, or is this a sign of fundamental incompatibility?”
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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