She Just Discovered That Her Sister-In-Law’s Relationship Started By Being A Homewrecker, So Now She Doesn’t Feel Comfortable Being Near Her Sister-In-Law Anymore
This woman’s father had an affair and left her mother and their family to start a new family his affair partner.
Then, as she grew older, she unfortunately was in relationships in which her partners were unfaithful. Several of her friends have been left devastated when their partners cheated on them, too.
“I morally think that no matter what, an affair or being a mistress, especially as a woman, is not okay when the person is married and has children,” she said.
She and her husband have been married for several years and are close to her husband’s sister. While she isn’t a fan of her sister-in-law’s husband, her husband’s sister is a blast to hang out with, and her sister-in-law adores her. Her sister-in-law’s husband was married before and shares a daughter with his ex-wife.
“They always talk about the ex-wife like she is crazy or something, which is something that I don’t like, and makes me feel off about my sister-in-law,” she explained.
Her sister-in-law and her husband have three kids of their own and a significant age gap. However, she’d never known how her sister-in-law’s relationship with her husband began or how they were introduced to one another.
Two weeks ago, she learned the history of her husband’s sister’s marriage from her husband’s aunt. Before they were married, her sister-in-law was hooking up with the man who would become her husband while he was still married. He’d assured her sister-in-law that he would separate from his wife, which he did before filing for divorce.
While her sister-in-law was still married, his ex-wife found out he was cheating and reached out to her sister-in-law’s mother (her mother-in-law) to tell her that her daughter was engaging in an affair with a married man. However, her sister-in-law prevented her mother from reading the messages.
After discovering how her sister-in-law’s relationship with her husband began, she felt a multitude of emotions.
sepy – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
In her view, someone who knowingly engages in a relationship with someone who’s married with children and destroys their marriage is a terrible person.
She believes that if someone has romantic feelings for someone who’s married, the person shouldn’t act on their emotions or date until the person is divorced.
When her husband’s aunt filled her in, she told her that her sister-in-law consistently told everyone at the beginning of the affair that the man she was seeing was already separated from his wife, which wasn’t an accurate description of the timeline of events.
Last weekend, she was with her in-laws, and her sister-in-law was badmouthing her stepdaughter, her husband’s ex-wife, claiming that her stepdaughter would rather live with her and her husband, but they didn’t have full custody.
She acknowledged that it must be difficult for her brother-in-law’s daughter to shuffle from his house to her mother’s house because of the custody agreement.
From her perspective, her sister-in-law and her husband aren’t kind to his daughter. Now that she knows her husband’s sister broke up a marriage, she no longer respects her and feels like what goes around will eventually come around for her sister-in-law.
While she feels awful for her sister-in-law’s three children, she feels particularly terrible for her sister-in-law’s stepdaughter.
Later, she explained to her husband that she’d still be cordial toward his sister, but she no longer wanted to have a close relationship with her.
Her husband could see where she was coming from, but she felt unsure if she was making the right decision to distance herself because her sister-in-law was always so kind to her.
On the other hand, her husband’s sister speaks so horribly about her stepdaughter and her husband’s ex-wife.
While they were around her sister-in-law last weekend, her husband could tell that she didn’t want to talk to his sister as much as she used to, and he knew that she didn’t want to hang out at her sister’s house anymore.
“My husband agrees that what his sister did was not right, but he wants us to be close to her and for me to forget what I found out. I told him I can’t and that I think it will catch up to her one day, whether it’s karma or when her kids are older, or her stepdaughter talks to them about their relationship,” she shared.
During the conversation, she added that it’s rude that his sister and her husband badmouth her husband’s ex-wife and call her insane.
She pointed out that maybe her brother-in-law’s ex-wife went insane after she found out about her then-husband’s affair.
Ever since she met her sister-in-law, even before she learned about the affair, she didn’t refer to her sister-in-law as a stepmother to the daughter her sister-in-law’s husband and his ex-wife shared because she didn’t know if her sister-in-law was comfortable with that label.
Her husband picked up on this and wondered why she never called his sister a stepmother, but she explained that aside from not knowing whether his sister wanted to be called a stepmother, his sister didn’t seem to respect her stepdaughter, so she didn’t want to assign this label to her sister-in-law.
She has since doubled down and wants to distance herself from her husband’s sister.
What advice would you give her?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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