Her Husband Said He Doesn’t Mind Be Monogamous For Now, But He Can’t Only Commit To Her For The Rest Of His Life
Last year, this 32-year-old woman and her 31-year-old husband decided to attend therapy together. They have been in a relationship for 12 years, but they did take a four-year break from 2017 through 2021.
A couple of months ago, she and her husband got into a fight about what their future will look like. She attempted to tell him in therapy that she feels incredibly insecure about how he discusses the future.
He acts like it’s only a matter of time until he cheats on her, and that’s what’s making her uneasy in their marriage.
“He expresses that he feels great about our relationship, that the “him” right now wants to be with me, but he can’t assure me about the “tomorrow him,” because he doesn’t know what “could happen,” she explained.
“When we were talking about this in couple’s therapy, the therapist said that thinking about spending the rest of your life with someone else is a childish idea.”
Their therapist made her feel more like she needs to stop worrying about the future so she can focus on the present instead.
But it’s hard not to worry at all when she’s concerned about her husband’s ability to commit to her.
Earlier this morning, they got into an argument again about the future. They had just woken up and were cuddling when her husband blurted out that when he becomes a millionaire, he’s going to get himself a harem of women.
This is hardly the first time that her husband has made a comment like this, which also adds to her lack of confidence in herself.
hokniti – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
Her husband has additionally remarked that one day he hopes she can find a girlfriend and they can have more of an open relationship.
They have fought about this in the past, as she is monogamous and is not interested in any other kind of arrangement.
Eventually, her husband stopped bringing that topic up, but he has not quit talking about how he can’t only commit to her for the rest of his life.
He said he’s fine being monogamous for now, but clearly, he wants that to change at some point down the line.
“I always had the idea that when you love and care for someone, you always think about committing to them, that you hope and try to spend the rest of your life with them,” she said.
“If this idea is childish, is a relationship more about convenience? I’m confused…I know I have to care more about the “present,” but having to hear this kind of comment once in a while always throws me off, makes me feel insecure, and I always start to think about stopping being with him.”
What advice do you have for her?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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