Abby Connolly
Sometimes, when you’ve been through a lot with your partner, they can expect you to support them, even if you take a temporary break or breakup.
One man is unsure what to do after his ex-girlfriend, who he shared his finances with, requested that he still give her an allowance even though they’re broken up.
He’s 30 and had been living with his 31-year-old ex-girlfriend for a little over a year, but they were together a bit longer.
They lived through some extremely rough times together and even lived in a car for a while. However, over the past year, they were able to share a place and get their lives together.
“When I got a new job, she indicated that she wanted to go back to college to finish her medical degree,” he said.
“I was fully supportive of this, and we worked out the details of our budget together. We considered the money I was bringing in as ‘our’ money, not mine. This was mutually agreed upon by both of us when we made the budget. I would be responsible for paying for things [like] bills, food, etc. until she graduated. Included in our budget was a small amount each of “spending” money. Essentially, [it was] an allowance for each of us.”
They would typically use their allowance for fun things they could enjoy together or give to one another, like gifts or date nights.
Unfortunately, they began having relationship issues, which he believes were mostly his fault. He was struggling with undiagnosed bipolar disorder and ADHD, which made him quick to anger and caused a lot of issues between him and his girlfriend.
Eventually, his girlfriend decided they should break up.
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