She Hates That Her Boyfriend Wants To Be His Best Friend’s Birth Partner After Her Baby Daddy Ditched Her
Dating someone who’s deeply loyal is usually a green flag, until that loyalty starts blurring boundaries. Now imagine living with your boyfriend, feeling like things are solid, only to find out he’s agreed to coach another woman through childbirth…and forgot to mention it until after the fact.
It’s not just any woman, either. It’s his female best friend; the one he talks to constantly, the one who used to date his brother, the one who’s embedded in his inner circle like family.
And now she wants him in the delivery room, cutting the cord, and playing a role that feels way too intimate for a guy who’s very much taken. Would you feel secure in this situation…or slowly unravel like she is?
For the last year and a half, this 23-year-old girl has been dating her 25-year-old boyfriend. They currently live together, and she says her relationship has been excellent overall.
Her boyfriend is more loyal than a dog when it comes to his loved ones, and he feels the need to step in and protect his friends and family members.
It’s essential that you’re aware of this about her boyfriend, as those personality traits are contributing to the complications in their relationship.
Her boyfriend has a female best friend the same age as him, and they have been thicker than thieves for years on end.
While her boyfriend and his best friend never moved in a romantic direction, his best friend did previously date his little brother.
“Their friendship pre-dates her going out with his brother. Now she’s also friends with the brother she used to date, but nowhere near as close as she is to my boyfriend,” she explained.
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“I’ve never really suspected anything going on between them, but I can admit it took me a little while to get used to dating a guy who had a really close female friend. I’ve just never experienced that before.”
“They talk all the time, and I’ll hear her voice randomly, and he’s listening to her audio messages he sends her. She’s always having problems with guys and relies on him to coach her through it or pull her off the ledge. He has guy friends too, and she hangs out with that whole group – she’s one of those girls if you know what I mean.”
Yeah, one of those girls who might end up stealing your man. Oh, and her boyfriend’s best friend is close to one of his female cousins, which makes her all the closer to everyone in her boyfriend’s life.
Her boyfriend’s best friend unexpectedly got pregnant after dating her baby daddy for a brief amount of time, and the guy genuinely appeared to be excited about being a dad.
When her best friend’s boyfriend hit the four-month mark in her pregnancy, the baby daddy confessed that he was not actually prepared to be a parent, and he disappeared into thin air.
“A few weeks ago, she asked my boyfriend to be her birth partner. Be in the delivery room, coach her through labor, cut the cord, the whole thing. He said yes without even telling me beforehand,” she added.
“When he told me, I was kind of astounded. Childbirth is super intimate, and it felt wrong that he’d take on that role for another woman. He said I was being insecure and selfish, that she doesn’t have anyone else she trusts.”
She replied that this girl is close to a number of people she could have asked to play the role of birth partner instead.
She said to her boyfriend that it was so weird to want a male friend with you in the delivery room instead of a female family member or friend.
Her boyfriend hit back that she was being jealous and possessive and refused to hear things from her perspective.
“Honestly, this has been messing with me way more than I thought. I keep replaying conversations in my head, wondering if I’m just paranoid,” she continued.
“Wondering if I misjudged and that everything between them isn’t as innocent as I thought. I also don’t want to be this nagging, controlling girlfriend.”
“I feel like if he were forced to choose, he’d pick her and their friendship over me. It’s hard to sleep or relax. I want to support him, but it feels like I’m losing him to her somehow, and that hurts.”
Her boyfriend is not happy that she’s failing to support his decision to be his best friend’s birth partner, and as for his best friend, this girl has started treating her in a chilly way.
She does feel awful for her boyfriend’s best friend, since this girl did think her baby daddy would be sticking around and had no way of guessing that he would vanish.
“I told him I’m not forbidding him, but I’m being honest about how uncomfortable this makes me,” she concluded.
What advice do you have for her?
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