His Wife Wants An “Open Separation” For A Year, So She Can Basically Have Fun And Not Worry About Him
For the last 15 years, this 36-year-old man and his 39-year-old wife have been together. They got married six years ago, but for half of their marriage, everything has been terrible.
Every single summer for the last three years, his wife has traveled abroad for a month and essentially ghosted him.
She then would come home and convince him he was making things up. That’s only a small sample of the nightmare his life has become over the past few years, but he doesn’t want to do a deep dive into this.
His wife then surprisingly asked him for a divorce, but he countered with a separation, as he doesn’t want to lose his wife.
Instead, she suggested an “open separation” for a year so she can date other guys, but he maintained that if she wanted to do this, he would like a divorce instead.
Anyway, they have moved forward with a separation, and if you’re wondering why he’s putting up with this, it’s because he’s madly in love with his wife, even after all she’s put him through.
“I’ve heard from friends of friends that she keeps saying, “If he wasn’t so attractive, I would be gone,” he explained.
“Why am I here still? I love her to death, and I honestly don’t think she’s mentally ok. Mental illness runs in her family, and there were some recent and extremely traumatic events that occurred in her family that I think broke her. She’s exhibiting signs of BPD or something similar, and this person is really not the woman I started dating all those years ago.”
“…She’s not the person she was 3 years ago. Like zero semblance. I kept pushing for her to get help, [but] she basically refused. We went to couples therapy, and we got fired twice as she needed to “work on herself before she made any decisions about the marriage.” It didn’t happen; she spiraled, but professionally speaking, she spiraled upwards.”
Valua Vitaly – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
His wife has turned into the fake personality she puts on in a professional sense, and he continues to hold out hope that he will get his old wife back.
He sees that side of her on occasion, and he’s seeing it more now that she has moved out of their home.
His wife admitted to him last night that she wants to have fun and do whatever she pleases for the next 12 months without having to call him or actually come home. She wants to have a good time and find herself in the process.
What added to the confusion is that his wife literally referred to him as the “perfect husband” after he agreed to a separation.
“I know what to do, I do,” he said. “I think I just wanted someone to tell me it’ll work out or tell me I’m being a fool for considering staying.”
“IDK, how do I stop myself from doubting myself? I love her to death, but she clearly doesn’t love me the same way. Why keep me on retainer?”
“I haven’t been the perfect husband, but I’ve been “overwhelmingly amazing,” and [our personal life] is “incredible.” I don’t get it. I want kids, she won’t be able to much longer. If she doesn’t want to be accountable, she wouldn’t want to be a mother anyways, despite what she says.”
Do you think he should finally rip the bandaid off and file for divorce?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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