She Told Her Best Friend That She Needed To Find A Paid Childcare Option Because Getting Called To Babysit At The Last Minute Isn’t Respectful Of Her Or Her Time

ChrisGhinda - - illustrative purposes only, not the actual person

This 27-year-old woman’s best friend, 27, is married and has two children under 3. On the other hand, she is also married, but she and her husband don’t have children.

They have been good friends for about a year and met because they work in the same field. Unfortunately, the friendship feels incredibly unbalanced and unfair.

She owns her own business, is her own boss, and works remotely. While she is super busy during the workday, she tries to maintain a flexible schedule. Her friend lives a half hour away and doesn’t seem to respect that she’s busy with her job.

“My friend always wants me to come over and help out with her two kids. I’ve noticed that I’ve been going over about twice a week for over six months,” she said.

When she tells her friend she’s too busy to stop by, her friend guilt-trips her, saying how anxious she is and how difficult it is to struggle with postpartum depression.

Because she feels so awful for her friend, she feels persuaded to go to her friend’s house and provide any support needed. She buys lunch, cares for her friend’s children, and hangs out with her friend. Recently, her husband has been voicing his concerns.

“He feels like I’m being taken advantage of, and essentially a free helping hand/lunch/childcare for two days a week, because I’m consistently helping her,” she explained.

After hearing her husband’s perspective, she agreed, but she’s a people pleaser who has difficulty turning people down when they ask for help. Whenever her friend requests help to care for her children, her friend has made her feel obligated, bringing up that she works remotely and doesn’t have children.

Her friend always says she’s in a stressful situation and needs support. Her friend’s husband doesn’t offer much support. A couple of days ago, her friend wanted to attend an in-person work meeting and didn’t give her much advance notice when she asked if she could care for her children. If she agreed, she’d have to babysit for four hours that night.

ChrisGhinda – – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person

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