When Her Husband Said He Wouldn’t Help Pay For Her Parent’s Elder Care, She Reminded Him How He Benefitted From Her Family’s Wealth All Throughout Medical School And Got Accused Of Throwing His Past In His Face

Iona - - illustrative purposes only, not the actual person

This 30-year-old woman grew up with a wealthy family, but her husband, John, 30, had a vastly different childhood. John grew up in foster care since he was a baby until he was 18. They met while in medical school. Even though her parents never gave John money, the help they gave her ended up helping him, too.

Her parents funded rent on her apartment, and when John struggled with his lease and roommates halfway through their first year of med school, she suggested he move in with her. When she discussed the idea with her parents, they didn’t feel it necessary to charge John rent.

She hadn’t been originally planned to have roommates, so they weren’t losing money. Since John lived with her throughout med school, he didn’t have to worry about paying rent. It helped him when he had to pay off his loans. She is her parents’ only child.

“My parents were always of the mentality that they would rather help me out when they’re here than with their inheritance since they could see me enjoy and benefit from it this way,” she said.

When she and John began their residencies, they were married, and they moved into her mother’s childhood home she’d given her as a gift. The house was worth about $1.5 million. She and John didn’t have to worry about paying anything.

Now, her father has retired, and her mom is elderly and has displayed symptoms of dementia. She and John have discussed what they’ll do moving forward.

“While my parents are wealthy, most of their wealth is vested in properties. With my dad retired, they don’t have much liquid income,” she explained.

Their options were either selling one of her parents’ properties (which wouldn’t be a good financial decision because property value increases over the years) or funding her parents’ care.

After she suggested the second option, John wasn’t thrilled and said that wouldn’t be fair for him. Because he didn’t have any family members, he didn’t think it was fair that the money they’d spend on her parents’ care would come from their combined income.

Iona – – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person

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