His Girlfriend Viewed Him As Stable Husband Material But Didn’t Really Find Him Desirable, So He Left Her

standret - stock.adobe.com - illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
standret - stock.adobe.com - illustrative purposes only, not the actual person

This 27-year-old man and his girlfriend, who is 29, have been together for three years now, and they’d discussed the idea of getting married in the past. So, he was hoping to propose soon until he recently found out something that made him super uncomfortable.

More specifically, he found out that his girlfriend doesn’t really view him as “desirable.” However, since he has a stable job, home, and lifestyle, she’s with him because she thinks he’s “husband material.”

“And I can’t see our relationship the same anymore. It would not be wrong if I said I fell out of love,” he revealed.

Now, he realizes that most people would be happy to be called “husband material,” but to him, it’s just disturbing. He realizes that everyone ends up settling in some way when it comes to relationships, but he still wants to be romantically desired by his partner.

Once he learned the truth about how his girlfriend viewed him, it felt like everything in their relationship started to make sense, too.

According to him, they’ve always had a very calm or “vanilla” love life. He’s never felt any passion from his girlfriend; meanwhile, he always wanted to experience more with her.

“We had several discussions about it, but it all came down to ‘that is how I am,'” he recalled.

“I thought maybe I just sucked at it since I was not as experienced as her, so I tried to improve myself. In the end, I just accepted it.”

However, once he finally found out what his girlfriend truly thought of him, they had a long conversation, and he ultimately determined that he simply wanted to feel desired by his partner. He wants to be in a passionate relationship, and he wants his significant other to find him attractive.

standret – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person

“I did not want to be seen as ‘husband material’ or someone who is ‘stable,'” he said.

That’s why he made the tough decision to leave his girlfriend, and now, all of his loved ones think that he’s being self-destructive and sabotaging his life.

“In the end, I just want to find someone more compatible with me, someone who’ll desire me and be attracted to me,” he vented.

Nonetheless, everyone else’s opinions have left him wondering if breaking up with his girlfriend over this was the wrong thing to do.

Do you think that partners should desire each other? Does he have a right to want that from his future wife? Was leaving his girlfriend the right decision? What would you have done?

You can read the original post on Reddit here.

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Katharina Buczek graduated from Stony Brook University with a degree in Journalism and a minor in Digital Arts. Specializing ... More about Katharina Buczek

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