She Feels Like Her Long-Distance Boyfriend “Disappears” And Doesn’t Miss Her Whenever He Doesn’t Respond To Her Calls Or Texts Within A Few Hours

Making it through a long-distance relationship is a major accomplishment for obvious reasons.
When you’re away from your partner, everything is simply harder. You miss the physical affection, you have to heavily coordinate and plan for meet-ups, often with long periods of time in between, and communication needs to be consistent. Otherwise, what else is tying you two together?
Since everyone is different, some people also have different expectations for consistent communication than others.
This 19-year-old woman is currently in a long-distance relationship with her 21-year-old boyfriend and is dealing with this very situation right now.
For context, when they first started dating, her boyfriend would actually respond almost immediately whenever she texted him or tried to get in touch with him otherwise.
“But now, whenever I text him, I always get a reply sometimes a few minutes and sometimes a few hours later,” she said.
She admitted that she struggles with both abandonment issues and emotional permanence due to trauma in her past relationships. Apparently, she’s told her boyfriend about this, too.
So, whenever he doesn’t respond to her for a “long time,” which she defines as a few hours, she gets really upset.
Then, when she tries to communicate her feelings to her boyfriend – and how she feels like he doesn’t actually miss her – it backfires.

Prostock-studio – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
“He suddenly bombards me with everything that is going on in his life, and I feel really bad about being so clingy,” she explained.
It also makes her want to “close up” and not share how she truly feels with her boyfriend anymore.
To be clear, she realizes that her boyfriend gets busy like everyone else. She also claimed to love him a lot.
“But how hard is it to send a quick text and update me on what he’s up to?” she asked.
In the back of her mind, though, she’s worried that she’s being “too much.” So now, she’s not sure if getting upset with her boyfriend for “disappearing” is justified or not.
Does it sound like her boyfriend does communicate consistently since he answers within a few hours? Do you think long-distance relationships are suitable for people with abandonment issues? How should she navigate this situation?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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