She’s Preparing For Her Obese Husband’s Demise, As He Won’t Do Anything About His Health
This 43-year-old woman’s husband, who’s 46 years old, is five feet ten and currently weighs 525 pounds, making him morbidly obese. However, he refuses to do anything about his health or contribute around the house, leaving her feeling both grossed out and overworked.
Moreover, she’s begun preparing for his death because she thinks his demise is inevitable, and she has no choice but to ready herself for a life without him.
For some context, they initially met online, and at first, she was hesitant to go out with him, given she had concerns about his weight. At the time, she was five feet five and weighed 185 pounds; meanwhile, her husband was 400 pounds.
Still, she decided to give their relationship a shot, as he’d been actively working to lead a healthier lifestyle and had already lost over 100 pounds. They wound up eloping about a year later, and their marriage started off “incredible.”
“I suffer from episodes of crippling anxiety and depression, and my husband has always been extremely supportive, if not almost a bit too enabling,” she detailed.
Unfortunately, though, after she managed to drop her own weight to 160 pounds in her early thirties, she went through her first divorce and hovered at 185 pounds for about seven years. Then, once she tied the knot with her current husband, they both began putting on more weight.
She has gained a total of 45 pounds, landing her at 230 pounds, and her husband has put on 127 pounds, making him 525 pounds today. This has put a major strain on various aspects of their marriage.
First of all, her husband has cycled through a lot of jobs since they first met, 12 in total, and he’s been fired from six of them. He often calls in sick to work because he is sore, and all he wants to do is eat, sleep, and play video games.
Her husband spends almost $1,000 each month on junk food and games, too, and she finds the amount of food he eats to be “mind-boggling.”
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“It is also frustrating because the food I select that is high-protein, sugar-free, and dairy-free snacks for myself are not even safe because my husband eats it all before I have the chance to eat any of it,” she added.
What’s most concerning, though, is her husband’s lack of hygiene and self-care. He doesn’t shower daily and leaves behind messes in his undergarments, in the bathroom, and even on their furniture cushions. Additionally, he has high blood pressure, trouble breathing, snores, sweats constantly, and consistently smells bad, but he will not schedule or show up to any of his medical appointments to address his health problems.
This has left her feeling isolated in their relationship and their home. She handles all of their cooking, cleaning, laundry, shopping, meal planning, finances, and maintenance.
“If I don’t do it, then no one does. My husband works, games, eats, and sleeps, but states he is stressed [the heck] out,” she explained.
Due to her husband’s weight, he’s also broken various pieces of furniture, like beds, chairs, car seats, and benches, sometimes even in public or at friends’ or relatives’ homes. She’s been sleeping on their couch for over a year now, and they haven’t been romantic in more than two years.
She simply cannot be affectionate toward her husband in his current state. She realizes that he’s been depressed, and he began taking medication over a year ago, but she’s frustrated that he won’t go to therapy or seek any help for his obesity and food addiction.
She also admits that she’s not perfect and, like most people, enjoys eating and having “lazy days” every so often. Nonetheless, she doesn’t want to continue down the same path.
Her husband has tried claiming that she is just as unhealthy as he is, and to be clear, she does have some health issues. She suffers from severe major depressive episodes and has fibromyalgia, lupus, and rheumatoid arthritis. The difference is that she’s started working on improving her lifestyle.
She quit eating fast food and sugar, cut soda out of her diet, and scheduled an appointment with her doctor to address her hormonal and weight issues. She’s also begun walking more.
“It is slow going due to muscle atrophy, but I am trying because I want to live. I want to go on vacation. I want to go places and experience things,” she reasoned.
“I cannot go on vacation or do fun things because my husband cannot walk very far, fit in airplane seats or venue seats, ride a bike, fit in small cars, sit in a booth, or many other things since he refuses to go anywhere or do anything.”
She revealed that she doesn’t necessarily want to leave her husband. After all, she still cares about him. Regardless, she’s finding it hard to respect him as she once did due to the fact that he isn’t contributing to his health or their relationship.
“There is zero growth personally or in any interpersonal relationships with my husband, let alone in our marriage. I do not believe my husband will be able to work for another 20 years, let alone be alive in 10,” she vented.
He’s completely aware of her concerns, too, as she’s tried talking to him about all of this for years. That’s why she’s now planning for her husband’s “unfortunate demise,” given his “current trajectory.”
But while she feels like she doesn’t have any other choice, she can’t help but wonder if that makes her a jerk.
Do you agree that if her husband continues living this way, he will die, and she needs to prepare for that? What advice would you give her?
You can read the orinal post below.
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