He Got His Son’s Boyfriend Sent To Foster Care, And Now His Son Is Upset He Won’t Adopt Him
This 44-year-old man has a son named Liam, who is 17. Liam and his boyfriend, Alex (who is the same age as him), have been together for four years.
He and his wife have been supportive of Liam and Alex’s relationship all along. Liam came out when he was 12, and he and his wife reassured Liam that it didn’t change anything.
They hugged him and mentioned they would always be a safe space for him. Sadly, Alex had a starkly different experience with his home life. Alex’s parents are extremely religious and hate him for being gay.
“It got worse over the years; screaming matches, threats, and what I suspected was physical abuse. We didn’t have proof, but Liam kept telling us things that made our stomachs turn,” he explained.
“A few months ago, Alex showed up at our door with a split lip and nowhere to go. He begged us not to call anyone. Said he’d ‘handle it.’ We let him sleep on the couch that night, but after some thought, we reported the situation to CPS.”
“Long story short: CPS got involved. Alex was removed from his home. It was heartbreaking. I still stand by the decision, but Alex was devastated. He was placed with a foster family in another part of the city.”
He thinks Alex is in a much safer place now, and the house where he’s living seems fine, but it’s far from where they live, so Liam pretty much only gets to see Alex during school hours.
Well, since Alex was placed into foster care, Liam has been all over him and his wife about officially adopting Alex.
Liam has been pleading with them to step up to welcome Alex into their home. He understands why Liam is so upset, but he’s become manipulative in his strategies for getting them to say yes to adopting Alex.
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Liam will throw it in his face that he previously said Alex was like his own child. Liam will also say that he’s responsible for getting Alex removed from his house, so he should adopt him.
None of it worked, and he still declined to adopt Alex.
“Not because I don’t care. But because taking on another kid is a huge responsibility right now. Fostering is a legal and emotional commitment,” he added.
“We have another child (10F), and I don’t know how bringing in a traumatized teenager would affect her. My wife and I work long hours. And frankly?”
“I don’t want to blur the lines between being Liam’s dad and being the de facto guardian of his boyfriend. What if they break up? What if there’s drama? What if they act more like a couple than teens under our roof?”
Instead, he stated that he can help Liam be supportive of Alex in other ways, like celebrating Alex’s birthday and holidays with him or showing up to his court dates.
He told Liam that when he and Alex turn 18, he will make sure to help them get an apartment so they can live together.
Liam is so upset that he hasn’t spoken to him in several days.
“He told my sister I saved Alex from a house just to leave him in a system that chews up kids like him. That really hurt,” he concluded.
Do you think he’s wrong for not wanting to adopt Alex?
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