Her Daughter Called Her Selfish For Not Spending Her Retirement Savings On A House For Her
There’s something uniquely heartbreaking about realizing the child you sacrificed everything for doesn’t see what you’ve done for them.
She didn’t just raise her daughter; she gave up decades of comfort, dreams, and peace of mind to do it. Now, with retirement finally within reach, she’s being called selfish for wanting a little joy of her own.
It’s not wrong to draw a line. It’s not bad to say you’ve given enough. Being a parent doesn’t mean giving up your future; it means doing your best to prepare your child for theirs, and she absolutely did that.
The hard truth is that entitlement can sometimes take root where gratitude should have grown. And when you’ve been the giver for so long, it can be jarring when one firm “no” is met with cold shoulders instead of understanding.
This 55-year-old woman has spent the majority of her life as a single mom, raising her daughter, who is now 26.
She juggled several jobs, never took a vacation, and refused to purchase nice things for herself so her daughter could have the world.
“She had everything she needed growing up; private school, a used car at 18, even partial support through college. I never asked for much in return, just for her to be responsible and independent,” she explained.
“Lately, she’s been pressuring me about my retirement savings. She found out I have been aggressively saving for the past 10 years so I can retire early and travel, maybe finally enjoy my life a little. Her response? ‘You should use that money to help me get a house.'”
“I told her kindly but firmly that I have already done my job as a parent. I’m not rich, I just planned well. And honestly, I deserve some peace.”
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Her daughter actually snipped back that she’s self-centered. Her daughter threw it in her face that she had to deal with so much hardship growing up, even though that’s not true.
She did everything in her power to protect her daughter from having a difficult life, yet her daughter cannot see that.
She put her daughter in her place and reminded her that she had to walk through fire in order to give her a stable life.
It’s upsetting to her that her daughter is so entitled; she thinks that retirement money should be spent on her wants.
“Now she’s been giving me the cold shoulder and telling other relatives that I’m ‘hoarding money’ while she struggles with rent,” she concluded.
She deserves this next chapter. She earned it. No one has the right to make her feel guilty for finally choosing herself.
What advice do you have for her?
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