She’s Pregnant At The Same Time As Her Husband’s Affair Partner, And She Resents Him As Well As Their Unborn Baby She Never Even Wanted In The First Place
Sometimes the person you marry can feel like a stranger in no time. What starts as love, trust, and promises of family can unravel into neglect, betrayal, and resentment.
For one woman, the man who once begged to adopt her daughter and build a life together is now the same man who cheats, threatens divorce, and blames her for not meeting his needs.
With a high-risk pregnancy and nowhere else to turn, she’s left questioning how everything fell apart so quickly, and what her next move should be.
This woman has a daughter, and her biological father is not in the picture. Close to a year ago, she got married to her husband, and he was always pleading with her to allow him to formally adopt her daughter.
She hesitated initially, and she reminded her husband that he already was being a wonderful stepdad to her daughter, so he didn’t have to feel the need to actually adopt her or do more.
He continued to plead with her, so she relented, and her husband has since officially adopted her daughter.
“Things started going downhill in our marriage about 3 months into it. I was extremely depressed and had a lot going on, especially with my own family,” she explained.
“After he became a legal father to my daughter, he started neglecting her. He’d come home and go straight to playing his games and never helped me with her or anything around the house.”
“I was always so exhausted, and there were multiple days that I would end up crying myself to sleep when my daughter was finally asleep for the night.”
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She sat down to discuss the problems they were encountering with her husband, and he resolved to change and be more helpful.
However, he just kept on making empty promises, and eventually, he started to grow aggressive with her, mainly because she was too tired to actually sleep with him.
She pointed out how she was drained and lacked time to spend with him, but her husband had no sympathy for her.
“Finally, he told me that if I didn’t start putting out, then he would find someone else to do so. I was hurt, and so I started sleeping with him, unfortunately,” she added.
“I was finally going back to work after having to be on medical leave. I told him when I would be going back to work, and he complained about it since that would mean that he either had to step up or there would be an additional cost of daycare.”
“A week before my return to work date, I found out I was pregnant. Staring at the positive test, I cried. I didn’t want another baby. I did everything to try to prevent it!”
When she let her husband know, he was ecstatic to have a child biologically related to him. She admitted she was not interested in keeping the baby, as she was scared to go through a second complicated pregnancy.
Her husband threatened to divorce her if she terminated the pregnancy, so she felt like she had no choice but to keep the baby.
She was right about how difficult it would be on her body, as she is high-risk and currently on bed rest as we speak.
She is pretty miserable overall, as her situation with her husband has not improved. Not only that, but one of her husband’s coworkers recently reached out to her to say she’s been sleeping with her husband!
“He’s been having an affair with this coworker, and come to find out she was pregnant with, apparently, his child,” she continued.
“I confronted him, and he didn’t even lie about it. Told me that I wasn’t doing my wifely duties since I neglected his needs. After that day, I completely shut down. Here we are now, 8 months into the pregnancy, and I resent my husband.”
“I resent this baby because I never got to connect with it since I’ve been so depressed. I cry every day because my daughter is so young, and all I wanted was for her to be happy and have a happy family. How could this man go from being my best friend and the person I loved to now someone I hate and can’t stand being around?”
She just doesn’t understand how her marriage fell apart so quickly, and her husband turned into a completely different person than the man she fell in love with.
She can’t rely on her family to help her through these trying times, as she cut them out of her life after her mom tried to take her daughter out of the hospital after she gave birth to her (while her dad attempted to facilitate this).
She also no longer has a career to distract herself with, as she got fired, and she’s pretty sure it has something to do with her being pregnant.
I think that she doesn’t owe him more years of her life just because he once played the role of a good partner. His actions, namely neglecting her, cheating, and forcing her into choices she didn’t want to make, prove he isn’t the man she thought he was.
A family built on threats and betrayal isn’t a family that will last, and she deserves more than being tied to someone who tears her down.
What advice do you have for her?
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