For three years, TikToker Rachel (@rachel_gualdoni) was in a toxic relationship, and now that she’s been freed from her ex-boyfriend’s clutches, she’s describing all the horrible things he did to her or forced her to do.
First of all, she was not allowed to use makeup, skincare, or lotion because he claimed the products would “ruin her genetics for having kids.”
She was also prohibited from going to the gym. He told her it was because her body was perfect, but she later realized it was more about control and that he didn’t like other men looking at her.
In addition, he enforced a three-step apology process for her to follow. It was called recount, recant, and recover. She first had to go over what she did wrong, acknowledge how her actions made him feel, and explain in detail how she would make amends.
If she said one wrong word, she would have to start the whole apology process over. There were times when the conversation would last as long as eight hours.
For example, one time, they had gotten into an argument for six hours. She had to recount, recant, and recover because she gave him a hug, which somehow made her selfish.
Another time, she went grocery shopping, which was the last time she was allowed to go grocery shopping while dating him. She spent $55 of her own money on food, and he told her that she was a reckless spender.
She could not wear anything revealing, not even yoga pants. He preferred for her to wear his clothes. Of the three years they were together, there were probably about 10 days when they did not fight.
He always invalidated her feelings, emotions, and opinions and thrived on putting her in uncomfortable situations so she could “build character.”
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He even had his face ID in her phone for over two years without her knowing about it until he picked up her phone one day, and it magically unlocked.
In hindsight, she wishes she could’ve left the relationship sooner, but the experience has helped her realize her worth and know what she deserves. She will never settle for less again.
By Emily Chan
Emily Chan is a writer who covers lifestyle and news content. She graduated from Michigan State University with a degree in... More about Emily Chan
