From magazines and social media to even podcasts and TV, we learn about major relationship betrayals and scandals all the time. But we usually hear these tragic stories from the hurt party, not the person who stabbed their partner in the back.
Plus, it’s even rarer for that same individual to express sincere guilt and remorse over what they’ve done. Yet, this 32-year-old man has decided to open up about how he single-handedly destroyed the best relationship he has ever had, and now he’s struggling to move forward.
He and his ex-girlfriend first met on a dating site and hit it off immediately. This sparked the start of their two-year relationship, and during that time, they were inseparable. The pair enjoyed everything from living and traveling with each other to simply cooking and watching movies together.
“She was kind, considerate, tolerant, and more emotionally open than I’ve ever been. I’m sure I was her first real relationship,” he recalled.
However, small disagreements started to crop up that pushed their relationship into a downward spiral. And while his ex kept asking him to talk about his feelings, he just bottled everything up.
“The more we tried to hold on, the more we hurt each other,” he said.
So, eventually, he broke up with his ex. In his mind, he thought they needed space. But in reality, they kept seeing each other, being affectionate, and obviously still shared feelings for each other.
Well, that was until he admittedly messed up. A few months after their split, while he was still talking to his ex (and they were both acting like more than old flames), he got drunk one day and hooked up with another woman. Then, his ex proceeded to find that woman’s undergarments at his house.
“She told me in no uncertain terms that she sees it as cheating, not just because of the physical act, but because of all the ways I didn’t fight for us before that moment,” he revealed.
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His ex believed that he had so many chances to prove that he cared, but he failed every single time. And following his night with the other woman, she deleted all of their photos and blocked him everywhere.
Since then, he hasn’t been able to stop reflecting on their relationship and replaying their memories in his head. He feels like he tore down the life they built together due to his selfishness.
“I know I hurt an innocent, loving person who trusted me. I’m disgusted with myself, and I don’t know how to live with this,” he vented.
“I want to change, but right now, it feels like I’ve destroyed something beautiful forever.”
That’s why he’s seeking advice from other people who have wronged their past partners. More specifically, he doesn’t know how to move on from realizing he’s the villain in his ex-girlfriend’s story.
Have you ever deeply regretted losing a partner? How can he start to forgive himself and move forward?
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By Katharina Buczek
Katharina Buczek graduated from Stony Brook University with a degree in Journalism and a minor in Digital Arts. Specializing in... More about Katharina Buczek
