The whole idea behind ethical nonmonogamy, which entails not having one single romantic partner, is that everyone involved is aware of it.
A woman who goes by @its_juh_knee_uh on TikTok freaked out on a man in the middle of a restaurant when they were on a second date, because he failed to mention that fun fact to her about not being into monogamy.
The second date was a blast, and @its_juh_knee_uh was having a wonderful time with this man. As their second date came to an end, they discussed having a third date.
“He goes, ‘Oh, I should probably tell you something.’ My heart dropped in my stomach, and I thought, ‘This can’t be good, but ok,'” @its_juh_knee_uh explained in her video.
“He goes, ‘I’m actually ethically nonmonogamous, and I have a primary partner. I feel like I should just let you know before this continues.’ And I lost it on this man in the middle of the restaurant…”
“I was furious because one, that same situation had happened to me a year prior, where I was on a third date with someone who revealed to me that he was ethically nonmonogamous, and second, that’s not, you’re not ethically nonmonogamous. There’s no ethical part if you’re telling me on a second date.”
She called him out and actually screamed at him for wasting her time. She thinks it should have been clear in his dating profile that he was only interested in multiple partners, and she wished he had disclosed that before their first date.
Additionally, @its_juh_knee_uh wrote in her dating profile that she was only looking to date one man, so he obviously ignored that or didn’t bother reading about what she was looking for.
This guy argued that they had a connection, but @its_juh_knee_uh told him they had nothing at that rate. She stormed out of the restaurant and phoned a friend to tell her about it.
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They both were furious, and @its_juh_knee_uh decided to send this man some angry messages, because she really thought he was something special.
She proceeded to send this guy a small novel, calling him out further, but he didn’t reply. More than one year later, this guy actually sent her an apology!
He admitted the apology was overdue and said it was better late than never. At first, @its_juh_knee_uh didn’t even know who it was, since she hadn’t saved his number, but then it hit her that this was the man she yelled at in the restaurant.
“Actually, ethically non monogamous person here. It’s in all my profiles, and I check they understand before agreeing to go on a date,” one person commented on @its_juh_knee_uh’s video.
“This literally happened to me. On the first date, they talked about their ‘roommate.’ Come the second date, they revealed that the ‘roommate’ was actually their primary partner. I was not happy,” someone else said.
“The EXACT same thing happened to me, he was married and told me on the third date, and said we could do literally everything a couple could do, but I could not fall in love with him,” a third person added.
By Bre Avery Zacharski
Hi, I'm Bre, Chip Chick's CEO! I have a degree in Textile/Surface Design from The Fashion Institute of Technology, and... More about Bre Avery Zacharski
