She Has An Autistic Internet Stalker And She’s Asking The Internet If It’s Ok To Block Him On Facebook

A 19-year-old girl attended high school with a boy who has autism, and this boy always really liked her.
He would always ask her to go to every school dance with him, which she kindly declined, and he always tried to hang out with her.
She felt bad for him and so would do her best to include him at school since he didn’t really have friends.
“However his crush developed and he began to message me on every social media platform I have almost daily (up to 30 messages in a row with no response), asking me questions that made me uncomfortable such as what I was wearing, if I would send him pictures, and where I got them, as well as telling me he would like to kiss me and complimenting my body,” she explained.
She did tell him that his messages were making her feel uneasy, and she said that she could be his friend only if he stopped asking these weird questions.
She also asked him to stop with the comments he made about her body, but this boy kept going with everything.
When high school ended, this boy’s behavior only escalated. She wound up blocking him on every social media platform except for Facebook because she didn’t want him to be lonely.
This boy started making new social media accounts and sending her about 1 new friend request every week from the new accounts.
“When I got a boyfriend he friended him and constantly messaged him (until my bf blocked him) asking about me and what we do together,” she said.
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“Recently, he even sent a friend request to my mother. He also seems to know stuff about me that I haven’t put on social media, such as my move to another province for university, and he once took a picture of my parents’ house when driving by and sent it to me.”
“I sent a message to his mother to let her know that he was making me uncomfortable online and that maybe she could have a discussion with him about boundaries, but she simply told me that “he’s just being a teenage boy” and that I should be passed my “tattletale” age at 19.”
“I decided to block him on Facebook because I realized that if he wasn’t autistic I would have a long time ago and I shouldn’t be treating him differently after I told him many times he was making me uncomfortable, and his crush turned to obsession.”
Recently, this boy’s dad passed, and he let her know that in a message. She felt bad for him, and after she gave her condolences, he went right back to asking her very inappropriate things.
She’s struggling with whether or not she should block this guy, since he isn’t your standard internet stalker and she does feel terrible that he lost his dad recently.
On the other hand, she’s feeling so uncomfortable with the things that he says to her and she can’t get him to stop.
Here’s what the internet had to say.
“Please for your own safety, stop engaging with him and document EVERYTHING. Make your social media private if it isn’t already.”
“He’s being super creepy.”
“I’ve learned the hard way that being friends with someone because you feel bad for them is not a good foundation for a friendship – but the way he’s treating you is not how anyone in their right mind treats a friend.”
“His mom definitely didn’t go out of her way to try and help her son learn how to develop healthy relationships, that’s for sure.”
“I am autistic and I can tell you that being autistic isn’t an excuse in this situation. I know I can only speak for myself, but while I know how difficult social cues and norms can be, I also know that a no (or stop) is a no.”
“As an autist, you need to understand that people don’t always act the way you expect or want them to.”
“While it is an explanation to maybe needing more clear boundaries, it is not an excuse to just do what you want with no regard for other people. People like this give other autists such a bad rep.”
“Came here to write this: he is hassling you because he is a predatory creep, not because he is autistic.”
“He knows what he is doing is wrong – you have told him hundreds of times to stop it. Block him on everything, and inquire at your college’s women’s advisory (or whatever you have wherever you are) if there are any legal steps you could take to stop him.”
“Document every attempt to contact you, so that you have proof when you bring the hammer down.”
“You clearly stated he needed to stop. While the autism explains the fixation, it does not excuse it.”
“You have every right to block him. You’ve been extremely kind but at some point enough is enough. Also, I am impressed you thought to tell his mom.”
“She needs a reality check because if he does this to the wrong person, real adult consequences can happen.”
“Block him. Stalkers crave any kind of contact or connection, even a distant one like Facebook. Don’t respond to him anymore.”
“Always keep your windows and doors locked and be careful when you’re walking around at night. He’s been harassing you for years.”
“But keep a record of all his attempts to contact you in case he escalates. And tell your friends not to post pics of you online or to be wary of accepting friend/follow requests; give them his online aliases just in case.”
You can read the rest of what the internet had to say here.
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