Ever Since Getting A Puppy With Her Boyfriend, Her Relationship Has Been Falling Apart, But She Is Not Sure If It Is Really Because Of The Puppy Or Something Else
This young woman in her twenties has been dating her boyfriend, who is in his thirties, for two years, and they have been living together for over a year now.
And even though their relationship had been going great, that all changed a few months ago after they got a puppy.
Bringing a four-legged friend into their lives was primarily her idea, but she claims that her boyfriend was also on board with it. In fact, he even suggested that he pay for the pup for her birthday.
The decision to get a puppy was not a hasty one, either. The couple actually contemplated the idea for about six months and even discussed how their caretaking arrangement would work first.
“Before we got the puppy, we agreed that the puppy would be mostly my responsibility since I am the one who really wants to have a dog in my life. So, he wouldn’t be doing much of the training or care,” she recalled.
Then, after getting those details settled, she and her boyfriend finally pulled the trigger and bought the puppy.
She ended up paying for the puppy itself. Then, her boyfriend insisted on splitting the supplemental costs– such as the puppy’s crate, dog bed, and training classes– which she was thrilled about.
After only having the puppy for a couple of weeks, though, she and her boyfriend got into a massive argument over their new pet.
Apparently, her boyfriend claimed he had no idea how much work raising a puppy was going to be.
berezko – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purpose only, not the actual person
On top of that, he kind of blamed her for not informing him of all the training work they were going to have to do before they got the dog.
“At that point, he already gave me an ultimatum that he would be doing zero work for the puppy during the weekdays. So, he was not doing any of the training or feeding,” she revealed.
Plus, she claims that all of the “reasons” why were boyfriend was frustrated were kind of bogus– since she was taking care of everything already.
For instance, in terms of her boyfriend getting a good night’s sleep, she handled being with the puppy at night.
She slept on the couch for the first few weeks while the dog was getting used to its new environment. Plus, it also helped that her presence stopped the pup from whining.
Her boyfriend also decided to sleep next to her on the couch a few times. But upon waking up in the morning after those nights, he would complain about not getting a good night of sleep.
So, she told her boyfriend to just sleep in the bedroom since she did not mind staying with the puppy alone.
Still, her boyfriend said he would feel bad about that and made the decision to keep sleeping on the couch with her.
Another example is her boyfriend’s annoyance about the puppy’s daytime whining. In fact, he became infuriated whenever the dog would whine for even just five seconds– because, apparently, her boyfriend works from home and claims the whining is distracting.
“My boyfriend loves working and said he cannot accept anything disturbing him from it,” she said.
Other annoyances include the smell of their apartment– which her boyfriend claims reeks of dog pee– and the couple’s life before and after the puppy.
After they first got their four-legged friend, they were unable to leave the pup alone for too long at a time. So, for the first few weeks, they did not go out much. According to her, though, this was not a huge switch from their normal routine.
“We were never the ‘go out every weekend’ kind of couple. Sometimes we had weeks where we literally did not leave the apartment to watch shows and play games. So, I never thought this would be a problem,” she revealed.
So anyway, all of these reasons culminated in her boyfriend ultimately blaming her for not outlining how difficult raising a puppy would be. He did accept partial blame for not researching the responsibilities and expectations enough.
Still, though, she claims that she told her boyfriend about the potential whining, potty mistakes, and more before they ever bought the pup. However, it appears that was not enough information for her boyfriend– even though she believed everyone knew caring for an eight-week-old dog was not necessarily a walk in the park.
Regardless, her boyfriend just ended up restating the ultimatum and saying he wanted his life back. So, from then on, she took over virtually everything related to their pet’s care.
She has since begun taking the puppy out for walks between five and six times a day as soon as the veterinarian cleared that. She also created a dedicated pee box in case her pup has an accident and has worked really hard on training her dog.
Now, she claims that the pup sleeps alone in the crate overnight, naps in the crate during the day, and does not whine anymore.
She and her boyfriend have also begun to go out to dinner every week and even go drinking on the weekends with friends while their pup stays at home.
“The only remaining issue is that the puppy started teething, so it bites, and the puppy does not behave very well when I am away since I am the only one that training the puppy,” she noted.
Despite that, though, she honestly thinks that she has done a bang-up job fixing much of the frustrations her boyfriend initially voiced concerns about.
To her surprise, though, her boyfriend still feels overwhelmed and even claims he cannot accept that life will not be the same as before they got the dog.
On top of that, just a few days ago, her boyfriend even said that he needed “a break from everything” before suggesting that perhaps they just needed to break up altogether. And she honestly could not believe it.
“It makes me so frustrated to hear that since I am doing so much work so that we will have his life as close to it was before the puppy. And the only thing he does is complain about what I could not resolve rather than see how much things have improved,” she vented.
She is also feeling totally confused about her boyfriend’s “break” suggestion since whenever they are not fighting, he claims that the puppy is the cutest and most well-behaved pet ever.
Then, whenever they get into a tiff, her boyfriend says he regrets ever getting the dog in the first place.
So, she honestly thinks that perhaps her boyfriend is projecting his own feelings onto their pet, and it is ruining their relationship.
And now, she has been left wondering if their relationship is really falling apart because of the puppy or if it was already coming to an end beforehand, and the new pet just exacerbated that realization.
Why do you think her boyfriend was on board with getting the puppy to begin with? Is it common sense how much work raising a puppy is or not? Do you think her relationship is failing because of the puppy, or is the new pet just a contributing factor that sped up the inevitable? Do you believe there is any way she could reconcile the relationship or not?
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