Her Boyfriend Dumped Her After One Of His Former Flames Sent Him A Steamy Text, And She’s Left With More Questions Than Answers
This 25-year-old girl started dating her 28-year-old boyfriend 4 months ago, and their first date was truly amazing.
She felt that they got another great from the start, and she felt a really intense kind of chemistry with him that she has never before experienced.
When it came time for their second date, her boyfriend told her that if he was going to be getting into a relationship again, it had to be open.
“I immediately told him I wasn’t open to that, but we still had a third date,” she explained. “After that third date, I tried ending things and said I required exclusivity while we dated/got to know each other.”
“He said he completely understood and wished me luck on my search… but then reached out to me that same night, saying he’d thought about it and was genuinely ready to have a monogamous relationship with me.”
“I assured him I didn’t need him to be my boyfriend, that we could still take things slowly, but he very quickly made the relationship serious. He started calling me his girlfriend, introduced me to his friends/family, made me a part of his son’s life (he has him part-time), told me he was in love with me, and even asked me to move in with him.”
She didn’t decide to go ahead with moving in with him when he asked, but she did discuss that she would be willing to sometime this year.
Around 2 weeks ago, they encountered the very first issue in their relationship. One of her boyfriend’s old flames (who he has remained friends with) sent him some a pretty steamy message.
She then decided to convey to her boyfriend over text that she was not ok with him staying friends with this girl after that kind of a message.
xo4uphoto – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
The text she sent was super long, and he received her text while he was driving in the car. Because of that, he only noticed a couple of things she had said in her message and instantly thought she was dumping him.
“We did end up having a serious discussion about it, and he agreed he’d set some boundaries with her, but this seemed to trigger something in him,” she said.
“He started acting weirdly distant and anxious about our future together. To the point that he broke up with me last Friday. The explanation he gave me: he realized he’s not ready for a long-term monogamous relationship, even though I’m perfect and everything he’s ever wanted. He says he believes in free love and wants to experience open relationships. That I deserve someone who can give me what I need.”
“I find his explanation very hard to believe… we had discussed the whole open/monogamous thing prior to starting the relationship, and he seemed very happy and satisfied with what we had. Maybe I’m just in denial… but I think he’s making excuses because he got scared? Scared of the commitment, scared that I might leave him as his ex-wife did. Like he had to leave before I left him.”
The breakup conversation went alright, and in the end, he mentioned wanting to stay friends with her. She informed him that she didn’t want to be friends and she didn’t want him to speak to her again.
Although they are no longer together, she’s left with more questions than answers. She’s curious if he was just acting out of fear and if they really can get back together and get to the bottom of things.
“Or do we just have different views on monogamy, and it’s a good thing he ended the relationship early on?” she wondered.
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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