Her Husband Just Admitted To Her That He Thought She Would Change Her Mind About Having Kids After They Got Married

upslim  - stock.adobe.com-  illustrative purposes only, not the actual people
upslim - stock.adobe.com- illustrative purposes only, not the actual people

This 27-year-old woman has been married for a year. She and her husband have been together for three years in total, and while their relationship has been healthy and stable, they’ve had some differing perspectives, but they’ve always been able to talk things out and accept each other’s views.

“The only thing that seems to be a stumbling block in this regard is the topic of kids. I’m ambivalent about the idea of kids,” she explained.

“I love kids and being an aunt to my nieces and nephews, but I don’t have this burning desire to have children of my own.”

However, if her husband deeply wanted to have children, she would consider the idea. But she only likes spending time with children in smaller doses, and she happily returns children to their parents at the end of the day. She does believe she would be a good parent, but it’s never been one of her dreams throughout her life.

Over the course of their relationship, they discussed children and talked about it again once they got engaged, but her husband never seemed to have an issue with the fact that she wasn’t sure she wanted to have children.

“Recently, while over for dinner with my in-laws, my mother-in-law asked about when we’d start trying, and I made a joke about us as newlyweds doing a lot of trying without hoping for any success,” she shared.

For the rest of the dinner, her husband was silent, and at first, she thought it was because of the joke she had made.

Once they got home, she kept asking him what was wrong until he finally opened up to her about what was on his mind.

“He admitted he thought my stance would change once we got married,” she said. “I reiterated that I’m not completely against children if he’s passionate about it, but he doesn’t think we should bring life into the world without us both being enthusiastic about it.”

upslim – stock.adobe.com- illustrative purposes only, not the actual people

“I’ve tried to explain that not having the urge to have children wouldn’t make me love a future kid any less, but he’s admittedly hurt that I’m good with other people’s kids but not jumping for joy at the thought of having ours.”

Now, she feels conflicted because she doesn’t think she’s wrong for feeling the way she does about the idea of having children, but she understands that he has a right to his own perspective, as well.

She doesn’t know if she’s only thinking of her own feelings and should be taking his into account, too. During the two big talks she and her husband had regarding kids prior to getting married, they had come to a bit of a compromise.

They both agreed that they wouldn’t actively try for a baby, but if she did happen to get pregnant, they would keep and raise the child.

She felt content with this option to “let the chips fall as they may,” and she added that if she did have a child, it would also be for herself and not just to make her husband happy. Now, her husband seems frustrated that she’s not coming around to the idea of becoming a parent.

Do you think she’s in the wrong about not enthusiastically wanting to have kids with her husband?

You can read the original post on Reddit here.

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