His Mom Said He’s Selfish And She Wants Nothing To Do With Him Now That His Grandma Is Paying For Him To Go To College
This 20-year-old man and his mother, 47, have been fighting about how his grandmother said that she could pay for his college tuition after his mother didn’t let him attend college.
Two years ago, he graduated from high school. At this point, the pandemic was really intense and affecting everyone’s daily lives. Also, his parents divorced, and his family wasn’t financially stable, either.
Once his parents divorced, he and his brothers continued living with their mother. Their mother tried to limit the amount of time he and his brothers spent around their father.
She only let his father participate in their Christmas celebration and their birthdays. After the divorce, he has had no ill will towards his father and has continued to love and care about him.
For the last 20 years, his father has suffered from Parkinson’s, and over time, his health has slowly deteriorated.
Eventually, his father had to stop working, so he wasn’t able to help him with his college tuition. Plus, his father’s mother has dementia, so his father has to spend a lot of time caring for her.
During his senior year, he was applying to colleges, and his mother asked him to apply to less expensive colleges because she wouldn’t be able to afford the ones he was currently applying to. However, the less expensive colleges he looked into didn’t offer programs that he was interested in.
“Hence, I decided to ‘sacrifice’ myself by not going to college in order for my mom to finance my two brothers, 19 and 10, who were still in high school and primary, respectively,” he said.
A year after he graduated, his brother graduated from high school. His brother applied for and was accepted into one of the top private universities in their area, and their mother agreed to pay for his brother’s tuition.
Rido – stock.adobe.com- illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
At the time, he didn’t feel bad that his mother was treating his brother differently. By this point, he no longer wanted to attend college, mainly because he was more concerned with trying not to add any more financial stress onto his mother.
While he doesn’t fully understand why his mother chose to pay for his brother’s college education and not his (unless it was at a much less expensive school), he speculated that it could be because, over the years, his brother always seemed more driven to attend college than he did.
When he graduated, he didn’t really know what he wanted to study or what career path he could see himself taking, and his brother seemed more certain of what he wanted to do.
“A few months passed by, and I started to get pressured by my other family members (uncles, aunts, and grandparents) to start applying to college. I would always give the made-up reason of not knowing what field I’m interested in as to why I haven’t started applying then,” he explained.
Aside from the opinions of his family, he also felt this pressure coming from within. Occasionally, he’d wonder if he wasn’t using his time wisely, and he questioned whether maybe that time would be better spent getting an education.
Finally, he couldn’t take these thoughts anymore, and he felt terrible about himself and was upset that he didn’t think he had been productive since he graduated from high school two years ago.
So, he told his mother that he decided he wanted to go to college, and he let her know the university that he had in mind.
Unfortunately, she once more said that she couldn’t afford for him to attend this particular college, especially now that she was paying for his brother’s tuition.
Understandably, this broke his heart. The main reason he put off going to college for the last two years was to try to help his mother so that, hopefully, she would be in a better financial position to potentially afford his college tuition in the future.
He was deeply saddened to learn that sacrificing college didn’t change his mother’s circumstances.
“My grandma heard of what happened and then offered to pay for my college tuition, which I accepted,” he shared.
“Last week, my mom found out about it and was furious, telling me that I was selfish for taking someone else’s money without asking her permission. She said she now doesn’t want anything to do with me anymore.”
Now, a few days after the fight, he and his mother haven’t talked, but he has already started taking college classes, and they’ve been going really well, and he plans to focus on studying something in the science field.
After the fight with his mother, he went over to his father’s house and updated him on everything that happened. His father is thrilled that he’s going to college and supports his decision.
Since he’s back in school, he realizes just how much he missed that school atmosphere and having peers to socialize with.
Do you think he was right to accept his grandmother’s offer to pay for his college tuition without asking his mother first?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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