Abby Connolly
For many women, baby names are sacred. When one expecting mother uses the baby name her friend or relative was vocal about planning on using, things can get ugly.
One woman, who lost multiple pregnancies, was extremely hurt when her sister decided to use the name she had hoped to use for her future daughter. Now that she’s finally experiencing a healthy pregnancy, she doesn’t want to invite her sister to her baby shower.
She and her husband have been trying to have a baby for several years. After the first few years of trying, she got pregnant and told their families the exciting news. She also told her family what names she’d like: Violet for a girl and Carson for a boy.
Sadly, they lost that baby while she was in her second trimester. Then, she and her husband started IVF treatments and lost two more babies. It was traumatic and led to a very difficult time for them.
Last year, after she had lost her three babies, her sister announced she was pregnant over the holidays. She was genuinely thrilled for her sister until she found out she was planning to use the exact same names as her. Her sister wanted to use Violet and Carson.
She and her sister had always had a pretty decent relationship. Her sister does have the tendency to get competitive but has never gone this far.
“I took her aside and told her that I was very happy for her pregnancy but hurt and confused that she would choose our baby names, especially with everything we’ve been through,” she said.
Her sister became very defensive and aggressive, claiming she couldn’t call dibs on a name. This wasn’t the first time her sister made snide comments about the situation, and she once even told her she couldn’t keep those two names reserved for herself since she might never have kids.
“I stopped bringing it up for the sake of keeping the peace, and after a few months, she told my parents she wasn’t going to use either of those names,” she recalled.
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