Do We Ever “Owe” Anything To Bad Dates? She Doesn’t Think So And Is Giving Advice For What To Do When The Sparks Just Aren’t Flying
Have you ever been on a first date where you realize you’re not interested in the person after about five to ten minutes? If so, you were probably locked in a dilemma of whether to see the date through out of politeness or just cut it short since you’ll most likely never see that person again.
TikToker Charlotte (@welcometothepeasantparty) is discussing how you do not owe a bad date anything and explaining what you should do when you’re on a date where the sparks just aren’t flying.
“It’s totally and completely normal to realize very quickly into a first date that you do not feel any chemistry with the other person, and you know for a fact you have no interest in seeing them again,” said Charlotte.
You may have been initially attracted to their pictures and were flirty over text, but when you finally met up, the chemistry in person just wasn’t there.
Sometimes, the reasons you might not be attracted to a guy are very clear. They might exhibit rude behavior or other red flags that weren’t apparent while chatting online.
But there are other times when a guy might check all the boxes and be perfect on paper, yet you get this unexplainable feeling that something is missing. You feel like you should be attracted to them, but for some reason, you’re just not.
Charlotte says that if you do not feel any attraction toward them, you do not owe them a second date, no matter what the reason behind your lack of interest is. Go with your gut, not feelings of obligation.
Perhaps you’re not 100 percent excited about them but still want to see where things might go. In that case, then it’s okay to ask for a second date.
Now, what should you do while you’re on a date that’s not going as well as you’d hoped? First of all, Charlotte recommends sticking to your word and completing the date as long as you don’t feel unsafe or uncomfortable.
New Africa – stock.adobe.com- illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
If you were the one who asked the other person on the date and had planned to pay, avoid changing these plans based on your lack of attraction to them.
“Also, don’t bait and switch or downgrade anything you promised due to the lack of attraction,” she stated.
However, she goes on to say that you can refuse any kind of “add-ons” or “extensions” of the date. If you’re out at dinner, you can decline dessert. For dates that are more flexible, like a coffee date, stay for an hour.
“In addition to that, just give your full attention and basic decency. If you’ve decided that you’re not attracted to this person, just try to connect with them platonically.”
Charlotte clarifies that you don’t have to walk away from the date as friends. Simply interact with them the way you would with a colleague.
If you’re struggling with the conversation, direct the topic back to the activity you’re doing. You can also befriend the staff and include them in your conversation.
When ending the date, do so as politely and naturally as possible. Thank them for their time, tell them you had fun, and make sure they have a way of getting home safely.
Saying these things at the end of the date does not indirectly promise another date or mean that you’re leading someone on.
How do you reject them afterward? If they reach out asking for another date, your best bet is to be direct and kind. Reject them the way you would anyone else.
@welcometothepeasantparty #onthisday in 2022, we talked: what do we owe a baddate…? #fyp #foryou #dating #datingtips #datingadvice
If true crime defines your free time, this is for you: join Chip Chick’s True Crime Tribe
How To Decorate Your Home In The Art Deco Style
Sign up for Chip Chick’s newsletter and get stories like this delivered to your inbox.
More About:Romance
