She’s Still Living With Her Ex So He Won’t Be Homeless, But She Wants Him To Stop Going On Dates With Other Women
This 38-year-old woman recently broke up with her 46-year-old boyfriend after it became painfully obvious to her that they don’t work out romanticly due to some incredibly toxic behavior patterns.
Particularly, her now ex-boyfriend didn’t want to be monogamous, and although she agreed that would work for her, she ultimately decided against it.
Non-monogamy just caused her a lot of distress, which was how she determined staying in a relationship with him wasn’t for her.
After splitting up, they continued to live together, as her ex does not have any money saved up, and he also does not have a job at all.
She is currently unemployed, but she has a nest egg and other resources available to her to easily move out and get her own place.
“So to prevent him from being “homeless” (his words), I have been trying to live under the same roof as him,” she explained.
“I have tried to be able to emotionally handle myself when he goes on dates, but it’s really, really painful, and causes me all sorts of emotional and mental distress that I really don’t need while I am trying to also get a job and work on my mental health (I’m now seeing a therapist twice a week to address some pretty severe stuff).”
“I tried asking him if he could please not go on dates while we are under the same roof. The person he has been seeing is married and in an open relationship, so it’s not like she’s even available for anything serious.”
After she requested that her ex stop dating while they continue to live together, he retorted that she was trying to be manipulative and controlling.
Photo 203090695 – © Nenitorx – Dreamstime.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
She would just like to move on and forget him, but she is feeling stuck and like she destroyed his life.
She did agree to non-monogamy but then took it back. She would have stopped dating him sooner if she had been able to tell this would be a dealbreaker for her.
“He tells me all the time how I’ve ruined his life and how he loves me more than anyone he’s ever loved before and that I should learn to control my emotions so he can go on dates, but if I move out, he’ll be homeless,” she said.
“I don’t know what to do. Is it really so unreasonable to ask him to not date while we’re living together? Especially if living together is the only way he won’t be homeless?”
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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