Her Wife Asked For A Divorce But Wants Her To Continue Living In Their Home And Shouldering The Bulk Of Their Expenses, So She Wants To Just Move Out Without Telling Her Wife

This 37-year-old woman and her wife, who is 39, have been married for 15 years. Yet, it appears that their relationship has not been all sunshine and rainbows since her wife recently asked for a divorce.
The real kicker, though, is that her wife doesn’t believe it’s necessary for her to move out– even after the separation.
For context, she has paid the bills for the bulk of their living expenses throughout their relationship. It was not until 2021 that her wife finally found a steady job, following a years-long bout of being “in and out of work.”
Still, according to her, her wife’s contributions to their living expenses have continued to be minimal– even after finding steady employment.
Apparently, her wife is only responsible for paying their rent, which she just recently found out is not always paid on time or in full, either.
“And everything else– utilities, insurance, groceries, phone, car note, etc.– are on me,” she said.
To be clear, her wife did have a solid job when they first entered their relationship. But then, right after they moved in together, everything changed.
All of a sudden, her wife didn’t feel fulfilled by her career path and chose to pursue art instead. At the time, she supported and encouraged her wife’s career change, too.
“Because I loved her and wanted her to be happy,” she recalled.

CarlosBarquero – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
“Thus, it has put me in the position to be the only one with a steady income for the last decade.”
Carrying the bulk of the financial load has not been easy for her, either, especially following the COVID-19 pandemic. Still, she’s always been able to keep her and her wife financially afloat; meanwhile, her wife was “carefree” and “unencumbered.”
On top of supporting their expenses, she also helped raise her twin stepchildren, who are 22 years old, still living with them and not pursuing school or working.
So now that her wife wants a divorce, she doesn’t think it would be fair to just continue living in their home and basically supporting an entire household full of adults.
“Plus, being in the house is painful for me, which my wife thinks I will get past once I ‘find peace,'” she added.
Her wife also travels a lot, which is the main excuse her wife is giving for why she shouldn’t move out. After all, her wife claimed that she could take their bedroom, and her wife would just sleep on the couch upon returning home from trips. So, her wife thinks they can just continue living together as “best friends.”
“But I believe my wife’s reasons are more likely that she knows she can’t take care of the bills on her own and wants to keep me around so she can keep living off my salary,” she vented.
That’s why she’s now considering looking for her own place without even telling her wife. However, she’s still unsure if moving out without telling her wife first would be a jerky move or not.
Does it seem like her wife is trying to continue taking advantage of her? Do you think she should remain in this situation or move out and start fresh? What would you do if you were in her shoes?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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