He Left His Fiancée Because He Got Tired Of Putting On A Facade, But She’s Furious That He Deceived Her And Wasted Years Of Their Lives

This 26-year-old man and his fiancée, who’s also 26, were together for three years and engaged for one year. But, he recently broke off their engagement and ended their relationship after realizing he acted like someone he wasn’t ever since they first met.
For some context, as a young man, he was apparently someone who constantly got friend-zoned. Women would use excuses like, “Oh, you are too good for me,” or, “I wish I was with someone like you,” when turning him down, even though he always made his intentions pretty clear.
“I tried really hard to make myself better and learn from my mistakes. I got more flirty, more direct, and more playful. Nothing in the end,” he recalled.
So, eventually, he decided to try and change who he was. He started frequenting places he hated, taking up hobbies he didn’t enjoy, and acting like someone he was not. This ended up landing him some more dates, too, and he thought his “genuine self” was not very interesting.
“I am introverted, read books, write stories, do geeky things, cook and clean. These are the things I enjoy the most. I did not have a masculine figure growing up, as I grew up in a household with seven women,” he explained.
“I do not have masculine hobbies or interests, which can come off as off-putting, I guess.”
His new, fake personality was also how he wound up meeting his fiancée. They got along great, but deep down, he hated all of her interests. For instance, going to techno parties, loud places, and hiking. And despite trying to become interested in these activities, he simply couldn’t force himself to like them.
That’s why he wound up acting like a completely different person all of the time. Then, just six months ago, he started going to therapy to sort out his conflicting feelings.
“The conclusion I came to is that we are both better off without this relationship. I realized my only focus became getting girls in my early twenties, so much that I turned my life into misery,” he revealed.

Unique Vision – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
“I realized I want to be myself and do not care if people are interested in me or not.”
Upon coming to this realization, he had a long discussion with his ex-fiancée, too. Then, he even invited her to a therapy session so they could get closure about their breakup.
If you couldn’t have guessed, though, her reaction to this news – that she’d been lied to for years and was now getting broken up with – was not great.
“I know I am not a good person at all. I deceived both her and myself for years and wasted years. However, I think this decision was the best for everyone in the end,” he vented.
Still, he can’t help but wonder if leaving his fiancée because he got tired of putting on a facade was the right thing to do.
How would you feel if your long-term partner lied to you about who they truly were for so long? Do you agree that it was best to break up? Even so, is he still in the wrong for deceiving his fiancée?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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