Her Boyfriend Spent $300 On Flowers For Her, But Her Love Language Is Quality Time
It’s just a bit north of a year that this 26-year-old woman has been dating her 38-year-old boyfriend. But they are both parents and recovering addicts and this past summer, her boyfriend relapsed, causing her to dump him.
After he got clean again, they resumed their relationship two months ago, and they’re still getting over the financial hardship his relapse placed on them.
Earlier in the week, she celebrated her birthday, and her boyfriend has spent the last few weeks questioning her about what she wants as a present.
She told him she simply wants to spend time with him, which is what’s most important to her.
“He’s been working 2-3 jobs for the last month, so we barely spend any quality time together, which is one of my biggest love languages,” she explained.
“Well, he surprised me with a $300 bouquet of flowers. Sweet right? Well, no, not to me. He’s always been great about getting beautiful bouquets of flowers.”
Normally, he buys her grocery store bouquets that cost no more than $25. Additionally, her boyfriend purchased a cross necklace (even though that’s not her vibe) and a watch for her, but she doesn’t know how much he spent on them.
Now, her boyfriend loves being passive-aggressive, and when he handed her the expensive birthday flowers, he remarked that it cost as much as a car payment.
That instantly made her feel awful. Later that night, he mentioned he would try to spend time with her before he had to go to work for an overnight shift.
Maksim Shebeko – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person – pictured above a woman holds a bouquet of flowers
That really upset her, as she expected him to hang out with her, not work or buy her insanely expensive flowers.
She couldn’t hide her disappointment, which her boyfriend ultimately picked up on, so he said he shouldn’t go to work and make more money for them.
That just served to infuriate her, as her boyfriend’s summer relapse was over him working way too much.
She did ask if he meant that he was going to stay, but he ignored her for a half hour, so she went to bed.
He followed her to her room, where he sat in silence on the end of her bed for 15 more minutes. Eventually, he said he would go to work, which made her so mad.
She’s not happy that her boyfriend wasted money on objects when she just asked to hang out with him.
Perhaps he could have thought to cook her dinner, as that would have been a sweet, appreciated gesture.
“Since the beginning of our relationship, every time he has splurged on gifts for me, I have expressed my distaste for expensive materialistic stuff,” she said.
“It’s the quality time and sentimental things that mean the most to me. Yet he doesn’t seem to understand this and gets upset when I don’t seem appreciative of his expensive gifts. I’m at a loss. I don’t know how to make him understand. I don’t know how to act grateful when I’m not. How do I navigate this clear disconnect?”
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