Her Ex Thinks She Owes It To His New Wife To Help Their Kids Like This Woman
Getting divorced is never easy, especially when there are kids in the picture. But when you throw in a new girlfriend-turned-wife who eventually wants your children to call her “mom?” That’s a whole different level of tough.
This 30-year-old woman sadly found herself wrapped up in the same drama after she and her 32-year-old ex-husband split up. They already shared a daughter, who’s now 10 years old, when their marriage ended. The worst part? They split up at the very beginning of her pregnancy with their second child, a son who is 8 years old today.
At first, they tried their best to co-parent their daughter amidst their separation. However, once their divorce was finalized, their relationship soured, and they began to avoid each other. Well, except for when they needed to exchange the kids.
Then, two and a half years later, she got introduced to her ex’s new girlfriend during a custody exchange. She actually thought her ex’s girlfriend was nicer than her ex, too, and had no issues with her.
“But something I didn’t know at the time was [my ex’s girlfriend] took offense to me handing the kids to my ex instead of offering her one or both of them,” she recalled.
She only found out about his girlfriend’s upset around two months later, while they were at her daughter’s preschool play. She got accused of “hogging” her own son throughout the performance since she didn’t give her ex’s girlfriend an opportunity to hold him.
Moreover, the custody exchanges were brought up, and the girlfriend claimed that she was going to be the kids’ “mommy” as well. So, she needed to “get over” acting selfish and hogging their children.
“My ex stood back and said nothing. I told her that I wasn’t hogging anyone and, at the exchange, I did what I always do when the kids go to their dad,” she noted.
Nonetheless, her ex’s girlfriend accused her of being unable to accept how, soon enough, she’d be the “number two mom.” His girlfriend even had the nerve to say that maybe her kids would start calling her by her first name instead of using the “mom” title at all.
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As you can probably imagine, things were quite tense after that confrontation. Her kids never seemed that happy to see her ex’s girlfriend; meanwhile, her ex blamed her for the drama since she didn’t offer to let his girlfriend hold their son.
But the chaos really ramped up when her ex’s girlfriend actually reported her to Child Protective Services (CPS) with false allegations of abuse. She was cleared of all the “wild” claims, which were reported anonymously. Even so, she knows the girlfriend was behind it because of some pointed comments.
“My ex’s girlfriend told me it was disgusting that anyone could clear me and that she knew better. Then, she said she’d prove I didn’t deserve my kids,” she revealed.
Her ex apparently didn’t view any of this as a red flag, though, because he proceeded to get engaged and plan a wedding with his then-girlfriend, now-wife. The real kicker? They planned the nuptials during her custody time, which was pre-arranged and on a shared calendar.
Spoiler alert: she refused to change her custody time, too, since she’d already made plans for her and her kids. And her ex and his wife decided to keep the wedding date, so they got married without their children present, and she’s been “hated” for that ever since.
According to her, her ex’s new spouse has been “vile” to her after tying the knot. His wife has made horrible remarks about her appearance, tried to turn her ex’s family against her, and even accused her of parental alienation.
“For years, I have heard that the kids aren’t as bonded with her as my ex would expect or as they want the kids to be, and they only want me,” she explained.
“My ex tried to get more custody as a result, and the judge told him there was no cause for an increase from 50-50 custody, which we had from the beginning.”
That’s why, during a recent school meeting for their son, her ex confronted her again. He pointed out how his wife had been in their children’s lives since they were young and believed she should be a “second mom” to them. Yet, whenever he or his wife uses the term “mom,” the kids supposedly correct them and even correct other people, too.
Her ex argued that she could be “kinder” and help with the kids’ acceptance of his wife. Plus, he stated that, as a mom, it’s her duty to ensure all the parents (including his wife) are respected and well-treated.
“And he told me that she takes good care of our kids, so I owe her some help with this,” she added.
“I told him I owe her nothing and to go back to those CPS allegations and realize I will never owe her or like her.”
In the wake of this discussion, her ex reached out to her a few weeks ago and admitted to believing that she’s actually happy their kids don’t call his wife “mom” or consider her a second maternal figure. He also called her a petty jerk for not “thinking of the kids’ best interest.”
Now, she honestly is thrilled that her children aren’t very fond of her ex’s wife. She’s never discouraged them from having a relationship and always tried to keep her kids out of the parental drama.
“By that, I mean I can’t influence what they see or hear at their dad’s house. But I am quietly super happy. My ex isn’t wrong about how I feel,” she vented.
Still, she can’t help but wonder if saying that she doesn’t owe his ex’s wife anything (and actually being glad that her kids don’t view her as a second mother) is justified or makes her a real jerk.
Does it ever work when people try to force themselves on their new partner’s children? Would you want to help out your ex’s wife after she attempted to take your kids away from you?
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